Reflecting on a rotten week

It all started this past Monday morning.  After having my breakfast, my stomach didn’t feel right.  I called in sick, and soon after, I threw up.  What followed was a rotten week of vomiting every day (which, it turned out, was due to food poisoning).  This led to excessive dehydration, which led to a persistent headache that basically lasted the whole week.  I had no energy to speak of, leaving me sidelined, and forced to watch my whole world crumble around me.

As I look back at the ordeal, I probably could write a week’s worth of content.  I could speak about how my body is a temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19), and so I need to be careful with what I introduce into that temple.  I could write about how this reminded me that every day we wake up to face a new day, it’s a gift from God.  Believe me, the older I get, this is not something I take for granted.   

But one of the most interesting things I found to note is that, it seemed like everywhere I looked, every devotional book and sermon, someone was speaking about the account of the disciples in the storm.  Mark 4:37 states that “a great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat, so that it was already filling.”  The disciples are freaking out, and the next verse tells us that Jesus was asleep.  Verse 39 can be so familiar that, if we aren’t careful, we are not struck by the incredible awe of the moment; Jesus actually gets up, and says, “Peace, be still” and subsequently there was a great calm.    

Mark 4:40 gives us a rather puzzling response from Jesus.  He tells His disciples, “Why are you so fearful?  How is it that you have no faith?”  Someone must have raised an eyebrow, and said, “Well, that was scary; we thought we were going to die.”  But the fact is, there was Someone in the boat who was in complete control of the situation.  He had the power to calm the storm, after all.  They needed to put their faith in Him.  In Luke’s account of this, Jesus’ words are rendered, “Where is your faith” (Luke 8:25)? 

This lesson was hammered home to me on more than one occasion: just like the disciples, Jesus will call me to a storm; this week was a time of extreme weakness, growing uncertainty, and intense pain.  But, even in the midst of this, I’m to put my faith in Him, not give into fear.  I am to remember His promise: “I will never leave you, nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5).  Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying this is easy.  But it’s the right outlook, nevertheless.

Let me address this question that someone might be thinking.  Is it possible that we may not even survive the storm at all?  Yes, it’s possible.  We don’t like to think about it, but the reality is, none of us knows how many sunrises we have left; only God knows.  To be candid with you: I thought about whether or not I would survive this recent storm.  No, I wasn’t on the brink of death, but I was still very weak physically and thus such thoughts popped into my head.  1 Corinthians 15 says, “If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men the most pitiable.”  The glorious truth is this: A Christian’s hope goes beyond the grave.  Because of my faith in Jesus, I can look forward to the paradise in Heaven one day.

In conclusion, there is a song from the group Passion that came out this year.  Every time I hear it, I resonate with it on a deeply emotional level.  On this most recent hearing, as I finally begin to rejoin the land of the living, I sang out these words of praise to God:

“In every high and every low, You never left me without hope.  You were good, and You’re good right now.  I’ve witnessed Your faithfulness; I’ve seen You breathe life within.  So I’ll pour out my praise again. You’re worthy, God, You’re worthy of all of it.  Your promises never fail; I’ve got stories I’ll live to tell, so I’ll pour out my praise again.  You’re worthy, God, You’re worthy of all of it” (lyrics from the song “I’ve witnessed it”).

God bless,

Kevin

Crucibles

The word crucible isn’t used all that frequently.  But the word came to mind in reference to what I want to talk about today.  Dictionary.com defines the word as “a severe test or trial or an extremely challenging situation.  This figurative sense of the word is based on the literal meaning of the word: a heat-resistant container used to melt metals” (found at this link under the "more about crucible" section of the webpage).  

It was eight years ago, this past Saturday, when we had the memorial service for my father.  This saga was a crucible.  Initially, I was going to share some of my thoughts on my dad’s legacy, grief, and the hope of Heaven.  But that content will be another day.  However, I do want to state – for the record – if I had to single out the most intensely difficult crucible in my life, it was my dad’s unexpected passing.  I continue to miss him, but I carry his example, humor, and virtue with me in my heart.

But as difficult as that season was, haven’t you discovered as I have, that there’s seemingly always another trial right around the corner?  For example, I recently shared that another dark season recently had come upon me.  I didn’t call it a crucible that day, but I did state that it was such a shattering time that I likened it to Humpty Dumpty falling off that wall.  I quoted a preacher who said that the King Himself had to put Humpty back together; that’s what God did for me.  I stand by that analogy, and I give Him all the glory for this!

It occurred to me that someone reading this might really be going through it.  You may be going through the worst crucible in your life right now.  You feel like you have been whacked around so much by life’s trials, you can hardly even tell which way is up.  If that’s you, I know what it’s like.  I’ve mentioned some examples of trials to make it clear that I’m not in some ivory tower, unattached from the crushing pain of life.  I’ve been there. 

As a matter of fact, I could write a whole blog about what has transpired in the last few days since I began writing this particular blog.  Although the situation isn’t fully resolved, I can state that in the pain, frustration, and loneliness, God has been so faithful.  He used Jordan St. Cyr’s song “Fires” to encourage me.  “You walked me through fires, pulled me from flames, if You’re in this with me, I won’t be afraid.  When the smoke billows higher, oh, and higher and it feels like I can barely breathe, I’ll walk through these fires, ‘cause You’re walking with me.”

Furthermore, Psalm 42 gives profound words of help to me, and I give them to you now.  The Psalmist was apparently going through it.  The heading in my NKJV Bible, right after the Psalm 42 heading, actually reads, “yearning for God in the midst of distresses.”  Psalm 42:5 says, “Why are you cast down, O my soul?  And why are you disquieted within me?  Hope in God.  For I shall yet praise Him for the help of His countenance.”  In a few verses, in verse 11, he restates these words again for reminder and emphasis.  I can’t leave out verse 8: “The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song shall be with me – a prayer to God of my life.”  There is hope and help in God. 

In conclusion, in the epic “Crisis on Infinite Earths” saga (the TV version from the CW), Superman gave us a memorable and stirring line.  Incidentally, since I’ve brought it up, the so-called “Arrowverse” had its flaws, I see them clearly.  But I don’t think enough credit is given to those involved in creating that shared TV universe of superheroes. 

Part 3 of the Crisis crossover event is where we are treated to Superman’s motivating words. Brandon Routh portrayed an older Superman who had tragically lost several loved ones.  But he chose hope over despair; he signified this mindset when he changed the color pattern in his iconic S emblem on his chest.  Rather than the yellow and red design, the yellow was replaced with black instead, with the red S.  When asked why he added black, he said, “Even in the darkest times, hope cuts through.  Hope is the light that lifts us out of darkness.”

God bless,

Kevin