My Memorial Day blog for 2016

I have previously written about the high esteem that I have for those who have given their lives in service to this country.  I’m so grateful that these individuals chose to lay down their lives to protect my rights as a citizen of the United States of America.  Such heroism humbles me to my core.  I honor and value the people who gave their lives on the battlefield for me.  Honoring their brave sacrifice is what Memorial Day is all about.

But there’s more for me to say this year than I have in previous years.  As you are well aware, my life has changed since last Memorial Day.  My father passed away very unexpectedly at the young age of 60.  Words like loss, suffering, and pain aren’t just words to me; they describe my life even to this very day.  Because of this major life event, my heart and mind is thinking more about the families who have to live every day without their loved ones.  Memorial Day is a mixed bag for these families.  On the one hand, they are so proud of the selfless heroism of their dearly departed loved one.  But on the other hand, Memorial Day is a very tough day for them, as they are reminded afresh of their loved one’s absence.

A few months ago, a coworker kindly gave me a book entitled “When You Lose Someone You Love” by Richard Exley.  One of the many things that helped me in this wonderful book is a citation that Exley gives from Joe Bayly; he said, “Death is a wound to the living.”  I don't think that you can really understand that quote until you’ve experienced loss firsthand.  But Bayly is absolutely correct; death is indeed a wound to the living.  You feel your loved ones absence in a myriad of ways.  You see the empty chair and you mourn again.  You hear their favorite song and you cry again.  You watch a TV show that you used to watch with them and grief washes over you.  It lingers on.

“Death,” Joe Bayly rightly says, “is a wound to the living.”  That’s why Memorial Day isn’t a jovial day of barbecuing or camping for the affected families; it’s a very bittersweet day.  So if you know someone who had a family member who gave their life for this country, make it a point to give them a word of encouragement and comfort on this day.  I know that they would greatly appreciate it.

Kevin 

A blast from the past

I recently listened to a CD that my dad originally gave me as a gift way back in the year 2000.  It was very strange to remember everything that was happening to me at that time, and to contrast it with where I am today.  It was like a time warp transporting me back to re-visit teenager Kevin.  (I’m sorry, I like time travel plots.  The idea of past Kevin meeting future Kevin intrigues me.  But try to stay with me on this one; I know it’s a little weird.)

Things have sure changed a lot in my life since then!  The biggest example, of course, is the unexpected passing of my dad.  That’s an event that past Kevin never would have predicted.  But there are other facets of my life that would surprise teenager Kevin as well.  For instance, he would be shocked that I’m not married yet; he would be surprised at how long I’ve worked at the job I currently have.  And he (or I) would be flabbergasted that I’m actually writing a blog today.  All I’m trying to say is God has written my life in a way that is very different than I would have ever envisioned.

The CD that my dad gave me as gift in the year 2000 was an interview with Christian Artist Rebecca St. James.  At one point in that interview, Rebecca said these words: “Trust that God loves you more than you can ever dream or imagine.  [Trust] that He has the most incredible future for you imagined; that’s beyond comprehension to you right now.”  Can you see, in light of this time warp imagery I’m using, how stunned I was when I heard her say those words?

I’ll be honest with you: when I think about the road of life that I’m walking right now, “incredible” isn’t necessarily the first word that I would use to describe it.  No, it’s painful.  It’s difficult.  It’s exhausting.  But I can also confess with complete truthfulness that I’m at peace with where I am in my life today.  I can say this only because of my trust in God.  God is in control.  The late Pastor Rick Ferguson used to say, “If we knew what God knows, we would always want what God wants.”  This is the life God chose for me.  I accept His will for my life. 

Kevin      

My father's love and protection

Before I dive into the main content, let me express some personal sentiments to you.  I have to admit that it’s frustrating to me that I cannot write in this blog as regularly as I would like to.  Aside from the brief blog I wrote a week ago, I haven’t written anything in May.  Life is busy.  Plus, I’ve been sick; so sick in fact that I actually missed four days of work due to a particularly nasty virus.  I’m on the tail end of it now, but I was sicker than I’ve been in years.  I wanted you to know the frustration that I feel.

Anyway, as I shift gears, let me share that one of the things that I have been doing in my limited free time is watching the TV show “Smallville”.  The show ran for ten years, but I prefer the later seasons for several reasons.  One of which is because in the latter years Clark Kent is learning how to walk the path of life without the presence of his Earthly father, Jonathan Kent.  This is something that I can obviously relate to.

In an episode of the tenth season entitled “Homecoming”, Clark is confronted by a mysterious character who shows Clark glimpses of his past, present, and future (sort of like all of the ghosts from “A Christmas Carol” wrapped up into one individual).  This strange fellow starts by showing Clark the past.  Specifically, he shows Clark Jonathan Kent’s last moments before he passed away; an event which he calls a “defining moment” for Clark.  I know from firsthand experience that to lose a parent is indeed a defining moment.

I couldn’t help but think of my own father when Clark’s guide describes Jonathan Kent’s love and devotion for Clark in this way: “We always have a choice.  Your father didn’t have to care for you the way he did, yet still he made that choice every day he was with you.  He chose to be your protector, just as you’ve chosen to be the Earth’s protector.”

Like Jonathan Kent, my dad chose to protect me (as well as anyone else in his family).   As I continue to navigate life without him, I can feel his absence.  My dad isn’t here to protect, love, and care for me anymore.  Because of this fact, I sometimes feel like Captain America without his shield.

Let me make an important disclaimer: by writing like this, I’m not implying that I never looked to God for my protection when Dad was with me.  I knew that protection ultimately was from God, not from any human being.  I embraced looking to the Lord for daily strength, help, and sustenance.  And my father was more than happy about this fact.  Having stated this, the fact is, Dad willingly chose the role of being his family’s valiant protector.  He would often swoop in, like a superhero, and save the day, as it were.

But now that he is with Jesus, I have had to learn to look to God to father me.  The Bible repeatedly speaks of how God will be a Father to the fatherless.  For instance, in 2 Corinthians 6:18 we read, “I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters,” says the Lord Almighty.”  This is a precious truth from the Word of God.  I can attest to you from life experience that God will definitely father those who are fatherless!

Kevin

The most famous verse in the Bible

Today’s blog is going to be shorter than normal, but I had the thought that John 3:16 is familiar to so many.  I don’t think I even need to quote it here because most know this verse by heart.  But I wonder if some of you have unintentionally let the familiarity rob you of the power of John 3:16’s message.  There are amazing, powerful, life-changing, truths found in John 3:16.  And yet some miss it.  I don’t want that to be the case for you, beloved reader.

Therefore, I’m going to ask you to pull out a Bible, flip it to John 3, and read John 3:16.  Pretend like you have never read the verse before.  Let its revolutionary message wash over you.  Bask in this amazing verse from the Word of God.

Kevin