Chivalry is not dead

One of the creeds that I live by is this short phrase: ladies first. I make it my habit to open the door for ladies, let them walk ahead of me, and offer to help them if they are carrying a heavy object. Chivalry isn’t quite dead yet!

By the way, I have to say this: when I open the door for women or carry something heavy for them, I’m not in any way implying that they are incapable of doing these activities on their own. Women are more than capable.   I once heard the story of how a youth pastor was chivalrous with his wife, only to be berated for it by an onlooker.  This youth pastor explained to this person that when he opens the door for his wife, he is not doing so because he believes she is unable to open a simple door; he does so to honor her. I agree. I also am attempting to honor women, not demean them.

A part of the reason I’m bringing this up today is because, not too long ago, I saw a segment on chivalry on “The Steve Harvey Show.” He was attempting to train a group of young men to be gentlemen. At one point, he mentioned something that I had never previously considered. He said always open the car door for a woman and let her enter the vehicle first, only then you should enter your side of the car.

I knew that much, but Steve explained that doing this is a way of protecting a woman. He continued by asking, what if you are in the car, with your seatbelt on, and someone runs up and attacks your wife or girlfriend? What are you going to do, unbuckle your seatbelt, get out, and then go help her? It would be much better to let her get in the car first. That way, she is protected and safe in the car if anything dangerous happens. Great thought, Mr. Harvey, thanks.

I’m trying to imagine an extreme reaction I might get from a female reader. They might be thinking something like, “If someone came up to me, I don’t need my husband/boyfriend to help me. I’ll just spin and transform into Wonder Woman, like Lynda Carter did, and take care of it myself.” (Some of you may not have caught the reference: Lynda Carter is the actress who played Wonder Woman in the 70’s.) Of course you could handle the situation. Once again, I’m not advocating that women can’t take care of themselves; I know that they can. But understand my heart on this: as a man, I want to protect the women in my life, and I’m not going to apologize for that.

Kevin