I
decided to share a second Easter themed blog.
More specifically, I wanted to document what kind of holiday I had. I do this because writing has been very
therapeutic for me; it has helped me grieve.
But I also do it because it occurred to me that this season may be hard for you as well. Maybe you
lost your dad this year, or your mom, or your spouse. I wanted to share this content with you
because I’m hopeful it will help you grieve.
So
how was my Easter? The word I have used
over and over again is bittersweet. The
dictionary defines the word bittersweet as “both bitter and sweet; pleasant and
sad.” It was a bittersweet Thanksgiving,
Christmas, New Year’s, and even the Super Bowl (which is basically a universal
holiday). The trend continued for Easter too. There was happiness,
but it was mingled with sadness.
On
these special days, it can feel like you are on an emotional roller coaster ride. The
moments of grief and sadness hit you without warning. For instance, in my Easter church service, I
happened to look over and see a teenage girl with her family; I noticed that
her father had his arm around her. It
hit me afresh that my dad isn’t here to protect, help, and affirm me anymore. This doesn’t just happen on holidays, either.
For example, not long ago, I was
watching a TV show. A dad was proud of
his adult son for something, and he vocalized this pride by saying, “That’s my
boy.” Without warning, grief washed over
me. My dad spoke to me with that same
kind of encouraging tone. It was a
reminder that my life has been irrevocably changed.
By
the way, let me share this bit of advice with you. Perhaps it's a little bit of a rabbit trail, but let me throw it in for no extra charge. It’s healthy to grieve. Don’t
be ashamed of it, and don’t let others look down on you for it. To grieve is to give testimony to the bond
you had with your loved one. As my brother,
Mark, once put it, “The only reason we grieve is because we love.” If you didn’t love the person, why would you
grieve them? The deeper the love you
shared, the deeper the grief. So embrace the grieving process in all its fullness.
Let
me conclude on a hopeful note. There’s a reason
that I decided to write this on the heels of Easter. Easter is a glorious event because it is the
day that Jesus Christ showed that He really is “the resurrection and the life” just as He proclaimed to a grief-stricken Martha (John 11:25). I have seen death up close and
personally. I’m well aware of how it is
emotional, gut-wrenching, and intense. I’ve
described its aftermath in my own life again today. So, please understand, I’m not minimizing the
legitimate pain of losing someone you love.
But I do know that, the truth of the matter is, Jesus has defeated death. I agree with an article from got
questions.org. In a question on how a believer
can find comfort in the death of a parent, the author writes
these words:
“In
the loss of a Christian parent, the greatest comfort a believer has is the hope
and confidence that our relationship with our parents does not end at
death. A Christian who has lost a Christian parent
can rest in the promise that there will be a reunion in heaven. At the time of the resurrection, all who
have accepted Christ will be glorified and given incorruptible bodies (1
Corinthians 15:42-44; John 11:25). For
the Christian, Christ has conquered death!”
I
like how Nicol Sponberg put it in an article of Our Daily Bread. She stated that before she experienced the
pain of unexpectedly losing her child to SIDS, she never had to, as she puts
it, “sit on that truth [of Heaven]. I
never had to put stock on it until a piece of us was there.” That’s the best way I can think of to
describe it for me as well. One day I
will have a glorious reunion with my dad.
Kevin
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