2023: The year I will never forget

As the final hours for 2023 tick off, I find myself astonished at everything that has transpired in my own personal life this year.  I could go on and on detailing some examples, but of course, the biggest thing that happened was when I was found myself in a hospital emergency room, closer to death’s door than anyone ever could have imagined.  Today I find myself so grateful to be alive, and so pleased to be able to welcome in 2024.

It was only a few weeks ago when I first heard Toby Mac’s marvelous song “Faithfully”.  The song was released in 2022, but it captures what I’ve endured in 2023 so well.  The song begins with these words:

“It’s been a long year; it almost took me down, I swear.  Life was so good.  I’m not sure we knew what we had.  I may never be the same man; I’ll never feel like I felt before.  It’s been a hard year; it almost took me down.  [Chorus] But when my world broke into pieces, You were there faithfully.  When I cried out to You, Jesus, You made a way for me.  I may never be the same man, but I’m a man who still believes...In my darkest hour, You met me, so quietly, so gently.  You said You’d never leave, and You stood by Your word.  So quietly, so gently.  In all my pain, You met me.  You said You’d never leave, and You stood by Your word.”  

Amen!  First off, as this song states, I also declare, in no uncertain terms, that while I may look like the same man, I’m not who I was a year ago.  Secondly, I also echo that even though 2023 introduced one fiery trial after another, through it all, God has been so faithful to me.  I wanted to forever inscribe to you here that I’m humbled by the Lord’s faithfulness, kindness, and goodness to me.  Not because I deserve it, but because of His grace – His unmerited favor – that never ceases to amaze me.      

In conclusion, back in June, I came across a social media post from Russell Wilson; essentially, he said that God is in control, even in the bad days, and to trust in Him.  In the throes of another trial at that time, Russell’s words encouraged me so much that I wrote the quote out, and I still have it with me to this very day.  So thank you for that, Russ (I probably shouldn't say this, but I confess I’m salty that the Broncos will likely part ways with him soon; 26 touchdowns, and 8 interceptions in 2023 isn't too shabby; I’m rooting for him in 2024).  The Bible says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding.  In all of your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path” (Proverbs 3:5-6).  Yes, the path may be rocky and treacherous, but I’d rather walk a difficult path with God than an easy one without Him any day.

God bless,

Kevin

Christmas aftermath reflections

Hope is extremely powerful.  In fact, the Bible declares a “deferred hope” can actually make the heart sick (Proverbs 13:12).  I actually don’t think it’s possible to live without hope.  Furthermore, the sad fact is it is possible to put your hope in the wrong thing.  Let me begin today by illustrating this: The Denver Broncos football season has been a wild one.  It started off slowly, with Denver notching an abysmal record of 1-5; at one point they surrendered a whopping 70 points to the Miami Dolphins. 

I blogged about that Miami game.  I effectively wrote off the season at that point, calling the Broncos “hopeless.”  But then Denver went on an impressive winning streak notching a 6-1 record over the next seven games.  With a 7-6 record, hope and expectations high, Denver was shellacked by the Detroit Lions 42-17 (the Lions are currently 11-4, by the way, I say good for them!)  And then on Christmas Eve, the Broncos were defeated by the lowly New England Patriots (the Pats are currently at 4-11).  This defeat led to the benching of Russell Wilson sadly, at least in all likelihood, ending his time as a Bronco.  I read an article from yardbarker.com (it can be found here at this link) where the writer, Olie Coen, contended that the Broncos should have given up when they found themselves at 1-5.

Whether one agrees with this assessment is neither here nor there.  What caught my attention was when Coen states: “Why play for nothing?  Why risk injuries?  And why give the fan base hope when there was never was any?”  The truth is, there may be a hope that promises but ultimately fails to deliver, be it in football, personal aspirations and dreams, Christmas expectations, or even relationships.  Now don’t hear what I’m not saying: by no means am I suggesting to give up on any of these items; absolutely not, far from it.  What I am saying is, no matter what, there is always hope in God.  “And now, Lord,” writes the Psalmist, “where do I put my hope?  My only hope is in You” (Psalm 39:7; NLT). 

Rebecca St. James is one of my heroes.  I recently happened to hear one of her older songs that is an underrated track from her 2000 album titled “Transform”; it’s a song called “Reborn”.  She sings, “If you see a change in me, don’t wonder, there’s someone in my life; a peace I can’t describe, for I’ve been reborn.  If you see a change in me, don’t wonder, I’ve found a whole new life, a hope that I can’t hide, for I’ve been reborn.  Have you ever felt a longing, a searching, within your soul for something more, but you don’t know what for?  There’s One who will reach across the distance from the Heavens to the Earth, because He loves you.”

In John 15, Jesus actually likened it to a vine and branches.  He said that He is the true vine, and we are the branches, and the person who abides in Him will bear much fruit.  I have experienced this in my own life.  To be transparent with you: whenever I choose to abide in the wrong vine, I soon find myself completely regretting it.  I love the way Jonathan Evans puts it in his book “Your time is now”: “Putting all your eggs in any basket other than God himself will only do one thing for you: teach you not to do that again.  Because when it fails, you’ll realize in the spiritual life, it is only God who deserves – and has earned – your confidence.”

In conclusion, as the dust of Christmas 2023 settles, I want to encourage us (because I’m talking to myself here too) put your hope in the only Person that won’t disappoint, the God of universe named Jesus.  Look to Him.  Abide in Him.  If you find that you’ve gone off course, run back to the Lord; He’s ready and willing to give the peace, hope and joy that comes from personal restoration via a renewed fellowship with Him. 

God bless,

Kevin

"A very special Christmas"

As I return to some semblance of my old everyday routine, I clearly don’t have as time to write these days.  But I have to document how much I am anticipating Christmas this year.  That’s not to suggest that I haven’t anticipated it in years past, but after my recent health crisis brought me closer to the valley of the shadow of death than I ever could have imagined, I am looking at things with fresh, super grateful, eyes.

A song in a Christmas movie I was viewing recently caught my attention.  The song is entitled “This Christmas”; it was written by Tim Kenneth Rogers, and performed by Donny Hathaway.  It was released way back in 1971.  “Fireside is blazing bright,” the song rings.  “We’re caroling through the night and this Christmas will be a very special Christmas for me, yeah.  Shake a hand, shake a hand now; a hand now.  Wish your brother a merry Christmas all over the land.”  I resonate with those words.  This Christmas is going to be a very special Christmas for me.

I love Christmas.  But unfortunately, the beauty of this time of year can easily get lost.  We run around trying to check off our list of treasures to give loved ones.  We attend various Christmas events.  Don’t get me wrong: these activities have their place, but once again, if we aren’t careful we can easily miss the whole point of Christmas in the first place.  Every December 25th, we honor the fact that Jesus Christ, the unique God-man literally entered our world. 

Sometimes we forget that Jesus didn’t actually stay a baby.  He lived a perfect, sinless life.  He orated amazing teachings; He initiated events that could only be classified as miracles.  And then the time came when He shed His blood and died on a cross.  This was all part of the divine plan from the beginning.  In fact, an angel even told Joseph to name this unique baby “Jesus” as He would “save His people from their sins” (Matthew 1:21).  Only Jesus, being God in human flesh, could pay the price of humanity’s sin.  What is that price?  The Bible says, “The wages [or the price] of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus.”  Three days later, Jesus confirmed His deity by rising from the dead!

Jesus is far from some obscure figure from history to admire at Christmas and Easter.  No, Jesus is the Savior of the world; He is able to completely revolutionize a life today.  I know this because He changed mine!  I promise you, if there’s anything good or virtuous from me, it’s a result of Him living in and through me (see Galatians 2:20).  Furthermore, a relationship with Jesus is not merely about going to Heaven one day – as great a perk as that is – it’s having Someone who will walk you here and now, no matter what wild and crazy storm life may throw at you. 

What if it’s all true?  What if God really did become one of us – in the person of Jesus.  It’s not a fable or a fun story; it’s a historical reality; it’s what Christmas is all about.  I heard a sermon where Greg Laurie put it this way: Christmas is not about the presents under the tree; it’s about His presence in our lives.  What’s more, you can begin a relationship with this Jesus, even now, if you’ve never done so.  The Bible says, “Whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved.”  Pour out your heart to God in prayer.  Ask Him to give His gift of salvation – the forgiveness of sin – to you; ask Him to enter into your life now and forevermore.  He will do it.  And therefore, to return to the song lyric from the beginning, this Christmas will be “a very special Christmas” for you.

God bless,

Kevin 

Batman v Superman (Part 3 - Legacy/Conclusion)

In September, I began sharing my thoughts on the film “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” (as per usual, I’m now going to shorten it to “BvS”).  Today I want to give my final thoughts on this maligned film.  One of the criticisms of “BvS” is how Batman (Ben Affleck) murders.  It’s true that he does, but it’s a mistake to presume that it’s the end of his story.  There’s more to his character development.  In fact, I submit to you that Affleck’s Batman leaves this legacy: no matter how dark the path they may be on, a man or woman can change.  Let me unpack this.

Batman misunderstood Superman (Henry Cavill), and this gross miscalculation drove him down a dark path.  For 18 months, Batman had bitterness, seething anger, and increased violence.  So much so, he actually came within an inch of taking the life of Superman with a kryptonite spear.  He was so deluded that he thought doing this was a service to humanity.  However, when Superman mentioned that Martha was going to die, Batman saw that he was wrong; Superman wasn’t the villain as he had thought he was. 

By the way, unfortunately I can only hit and run on this, but the controversial “Martha” scene in “BvS” is one that probably could have been executed a little bit better.  But the change of heart is not simply because Clark and Bruce both have a mother named Martha!  Whatever your opinion on the scene, the result is Batman ultimately fights alongside Superman.  Moreover, as a gesture of friendship, he promises Superman that he will save Martha.  And in a dazzling scene (one of my favorite scenes of the film), Batman singlehandedly fights off probably 30 men, and rescues Martha. 

At the film’s end, Superman selflessly died to save the lives of humanity, including the lives of Batman and Wonder Woman.  This was the only course of action; only Superman was capable of this heroic act to save the world – a clear picture of what Jesus Christ did for us on the cross.  This picture was completed in 2017’s “Justice League” when Superman returned from the dead.  And it was Superman’s influence that had changed Batman.  One example of this is when Batman visits an incarcerated Lex Luthor (Jesse Eisenberg).

Speaking of Lex, while Eisenberg’s performance as Luthor in “BvS” receives a lot of criticism, I think Eisenberg is a lot of fun to watch in this role.  He is brilliant, calculating, and manipulative.  Interestingly, the dialogue also suggests that this is actually Lex Luthor Jr (like father, like son).  Anyway, Batman confronts Lex in jail.  Luthor is sure that Bats will use a branding iron on his neck, just as he had done to other criminals earlier in the film, but this time, he doesn’t.  His transformation is further evidenced by his concern for life in subsequent films in this cinematic universe.  For example, in 2016’s “Suicide Squad” Batman saves Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie) from drowning, even though she essentially thanks him by turning around and trying to kill him.

Let me conclude with a fascinating contrast.  There’s another live action presentation of a Batman that went down on a dark path.  In 2019, the CW presented an epic crossover event titled “Crisis on Infinite Earths”.  In part 2 of this saga, we were treated to Kevin Conroy playing an aged Bruce Wayne, only able to move around with the help of an exoskeleton suit.  Batwoman and Supergirl travel to his Earth (referred to as Earth-99) to recruit him, but in a stunning development, it is revealed that this Bruce Wayne was far from honorable (spoiler alert).  This Bruce, by his own admission, murdered without remorse or guilt.  In his consuming hatred of all things Kryptonian, he tried (unsuccessfully) to murder Supergirl.

As a result of the fight, the Bruce of that alternate Earth died.  His last words to Batwoman were: “There is no hope.”  Shout-out to the talented Kevin Conroy here (I confess I’m still in grief over Kevin’s death); he was chilling as a hardened villain, rather than a noble hero.  Conversely, Ben Affleck’s Batman – his cinematic legacy as I see it – showed us the truth: there is always hope.  Christmas will quickly be here.  As November of 2023 ends in a matter of hours, I want to conclude my thoughts on “BvS” by saying there is hope for you and for me today, no matter what – because of Jesus.      

God bless,

Kevin             

Thanksgiving Day reflections, 2023

I wanted to take a moment to express a heartfelt “Happy Thanksgiving” to you.  Psalm 136:3 says, “Give thanks to the Lord of lords: His love endures forever.”  I’m so grateful to the Lord for the incredible blessings He has given.  I’m thankful for family and friends; I’m thankful for eyes that can see, ears that can hear, and a mouth that can speak.  I’m thankful for a beating heart, health, and the opportunity to enjoy another day (this year has reinforced the idea that every day is truly a gift that should not be taken for granted).  But most of all, I’m so grateful for my personal relationship with the God of the universe.

You say, “I appreciate your unbridled positivity, but I’m not feeling that way.  I’m feeling miserable.”  I get it.  2023 has been incredibly difficult for me; it seemingly has been just one thing after another.  Just so you know, I’ve had times this year where I’ve felt weighed down with fear, anxiety, sadness, frustration, and heartache.  In those moments, how thankful I was for the hope, help, peace, and safety found in Jesus!  Proverbs 18:10 states, “The name of the Lord is a strong tower; The righteous run to it, and are safe.”

Months ago now, I began revisiting the 2016 film “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice”.  Its progress has been much too slow, I admit it.  But I haven’t forgotten about it.  For today, I bring it up because I’ve re-reading Paul Asay’s fine book on Batman titled “God on the Streets of Gotham: What the Big Screen Batman Can Teach us about God and ourselves”.  In chapter 6, Asay writes these words that have helped me; may they help you as well:

“Our faith doesn’t keep us from suffering.  It doesn’t save us from the anguish of losing a parent or child, the pain of losing a job or failing a class.  It doesn’t keep us from the real horrors that life can inflict on us - the abuse, the betrayal, the unimaginable anguish that, for whatever reason, sometimes we have to deal with.  But faith can save us from the mortal blow, the fire that would otherwise consume us.”  In the next section of this chapter, he quotes from an anonymous believer who puts it so well: “Finding God does not mean building a house in a land of no storms, but building a house that no storm can destroy.” 

God bless,

Kevin

Praising God in a very stormy 2023

2023 has been a difficult year.  I’ve documented some of what has occurred: for instance, in August I likened that portion of 2023 to Humpty Dumpty falling off of the wall.  I felt like that storm shattered me into a million pieces.  And, as the rhyme goes, all the king’s horses and men couldn’t put me back together, because as I heard a preacher rightly declare, “Only the King Himself can put Humpty back together.”  That’s what God did for me. 

Then, a few months ago, I was thrown into another massive storm when a sickness put me in the hospital.  After being diagnosed with an ulcer, internal bleeding and anemia, I was thrust, once again, to an intense road of suffering.  Even now, I’m sidelined, and still unable to return my old routine.  As I’ve battled moments of sadness and discouragement during these months, I’ve told myself inwardly a hundred times that there is hope; hope in a great God who has been faithful to me in days past, and to this very day, continues to be.

But, in the midst of all of that, today I find myself reeling from a new episode of stormy weather.  It’s too fresh for me to go into detail now – that’s for another day – but it left me spent and literally shaking.  What do you do when this new development occurs?  I mean, 2023 is already a year I will never forget for the rest of my life, and then to have this new stuff on top of it all.  It leaves me reeling and overwrought.  In the throes of this, I made the choice to look to God in trust, surrender, and worship, even though life hurts.  Such a choice is not easy or automatic.  But it’s as I heard a worship leader declare years ago; he said, “The proper response is worship.”

Someone needs these words.  You find yourself in the midst of a difficult year as well.  It’s been one painful circumstance after another.  And you find yourself weary, fearful, and despairing; wondering what’s next.  There is hope for you today.  The Bible speaks of “lay[ing] hold of the hope set before us.  This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast” (Hebrews 6:18-19).  In context, what is being spoken of here is God’s reliability, faithfulness, and trustworthiness.  Back in August I quoted these great words from Superman: “Even in the darkest times, hope cuts through.  Hope is the light that lifts us out of darkness.”  That’s my prayer for anyone who reads this content today.

Back in June of this year, Brandon Lake released his powerful song, “Praise You Anywhere.”  It begins this way: “Sometimes you’ve got to dance through the darkness, sing through fire, praise when it don’t make sense.  Sometimes you’ve got to stare down the giant, worship from the lion’s den…I’ll praise You anywhere.  Praise, give Him praise, give Him praise, in the highest.  Praise, give Him praise, give Him praise, in the highest.  He is worthy, yes, He is worthy of all of the praise.”  And then there’s this stanza: “Faithful all my life, blessings day and night, countless reasons why I’ll praise You anywhere.  Every promise kept, goodness every step, each and every breath, I’ll praise You anywhere.”

God bless,

Kevin

Batman v Superman (Part 2 - Hope?)

It seems like it was a long, long time ago now when I presented the first installment of my thoughts on the 2016 film “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” (just as I did last time, I’m going to shorten it to “BvS” throughout).  There was a time when I enjoyed this film, but as the years passed – with the general consensus of other moviegoers – I disliked this film.  Today, having recently seen the ultimate edition (the superior version) of this film on DVD, I appreciate it for what it is, but I am in no way declaring that this is the best superhero film ever made either. 

In part 1, I spoke about Batman in “BvS”.  While eventually I plan to return to my thoughts on Batman and his arc in this movie, today I want to talk about Superman.  The Man of Steel is out of character in this whole film, as I see it.  Please understand that I’m not bashing Henry Cavill at all. I think Cavill was a good Superman, but in “BvS”, he was not given all that much admirable content to work with – at least in my opinion.

Before diving in, there is one other thing I need to cover in this introduction: the concept of a multiverse.  The CW network presented a connected universe of heroes someone dubbed the “Arrow-verse” and the name stuck.  The idea is entirely separate universes, similar in some ways to ours, but in other ways, significantly different.  This concept really helped me to understand “BvS”.  For instance, the Batman of this “universe” may not have the smarts that other Batmen typically do (did Batman ever figure out Clark is Superman in “BvS”?), but in what has commonly been referred to as the “Snyder-verse” after Director Zack Snyder, that’s just the way he is.

That said, I still can’t get behind Superman’s attitude in this film.  They already established in the previous film “Man of Steel” (2013) that the S emblem on his uniform on Krypton means “hope”; yet Superman doesn’t radiate much hope in “BvS”.  In fact, there’s a scene where Lois reminds Superman of the family crest he wears and what it means, he basically shrugs it off, and calls it the dream of his father.  Now I get that Superman is inexperienced, mistrusted, debated, and manipulated all throughout the movie.  But no matter how dark the situation, I don’t believe that any Superman in the multiverse would ever say, “No one stays good in the world.”  The first time I heard him deliver that line, my jaw dropped.

Let me contrast this with another superhero film.  Until recently, I had not seen “The Amazing Spider-Man 2” (2014) since that day in the theater 9 years ago.  The reason for this, in large part, was because I knew that Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone) dies at the end of the film.  But I had completely forgotten what transpired after this sad development.  Peter Parker (Andrew Garfield) is devastated and broken-hearted.  But he decides to watch the speech Gwen had given at Graduation Day – he had originally missed it, of course, thanks to his duties as Spider-Man.  Gwen’s speech, in part, was as follows:

“It’s easy to feel hopeful on a beautiful day like today.  But there will be dark days ahead of us too.  There will be days when you will feel all alone, and that’s when hope is needed most.  No matter how buried it gets, or how lost you feel, you must promise me that you will hold on to hope.  Keep it alive.  We have to be greater than what we suffer.”  Gwen’s hopeful words inspired Peter.  And frankly, they inspired me too.  They made me wish that Superman, even in his dire situation in “BvS”, rather than saying "No one stays good in this world" had instead said something like, “There’s always hope.”  But that wasn’t to be.

Despite all of this, I applaud Superman’s selfless act at the end of “BvS”.  Lex Luthor had created the ultimate weapon, he dubbed it “Doomsday”.  This creature was on a destructive rampage.  Contrary to some critics, no one was going to be able to stop it; not even Batman or Wonder Woman.  So Superman decided to act: he gave his life to destroy the monster, saving countless lives in the process.  I also disagree with those who contend this has moment no emotional impact, because he would just be resurrected next year in “Justice League”.  I confess I cried as I viewed the scene.  In that moment, whether it was intentional or not, I saw my Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who gave His life for humanity on a cross.  “So that whoever believes in Him,” states the famous verse in John 3, “will not perish, but have everlasting life.”

To be continued!

Kevin     

Walk or just talk?

Earlier this month I mentioned that I recently heard a sermon where the pastor spoke of how a 62-year-old man in the congregation had passed away suddenly.  Another example of how we don’t know what a day will bring, and we don’t know when our appointment with death will be (that's not even my main point today, I just threw that in for free).

This pastor went on to state that, when he met with the family to help plan the memorial service and process their grief, this 62-year-old had a daughter who verbalized a tremendous compliment for her dad.  She said, “First and foremost, dad was a man of God; he not only talked the talk, he walked the walk.”  This pastor went on to muse that, if he had been the one who had died, would the same sentiment be said of him.  Then he asked the same question of his congregation.

As I heard this, this line of thought struck me as particularly relevant.  If I had passed away last month, when I was much sicker than I knew, would someone say of me, “Kevin was a man of God; he not only talked the talk, but he walked the walk”?  This has been a thought-proving and inspiring question.

This exercise can be looked at from a lot of different angles.  First off, know that I'm an inconsistent man, who sometimes falls flat on my face, metaphorically speaking.  Then I get up, and fall down again.  Don’t look to me as some superhuman figure.  No, I put my pants on one leg at a time like everyone else.  So I wanted to make that clear, first of all, even though my desire every day is to “walk the walk,” I’m not perfect.  And I won’t be until I enter the paradise of Heaven and see my dad again, the heroes of the faith, and most importantly, Jesus Himself.

Secondly, whatever praise I would receive, whatever verbal accolades there may be, I give God the honor and glory for it.  Because, whatever good and praiseworthy is ultimately not because of me; it’s Jesus in me and through me.  The Bible says, “It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God” (Galatians 2:20).  The more I walk with the Lord, the deeper I resonate with this truth.  I’ve regularly spoken of Pastor Rick Ferguson, who unexpectedly passed away at age 46.  In his last sermon, he stated that there are four words that define that Christian life: “Not I, but Christ.”

As I was putting this blog together, I heard a song on the radio that I had never heard before, but it resonated with me.  In the midst of this chapter of suffering and uncertainty, I was so blessed to hear this song from Bryan Fowler.  In the chorus, he says these words: 

“I need truth instead of answers; I need faith instead of sight; I need trust when I can’t find the reasons why.  I need presence over blessing; I need promise over proof; I need hope instead of healing in my life.  What I really need is You” (this is the title track from his 2019 album titled “What I really Need”).  

Fowler’s words invited me to take my eyes off of my circumstances and put them on my Savior.  It was a much needed reminder that in Jesus Christ I have everything I need.  He is hope, truth, and peace.  My desire is turn right around and to point you to Him – maybe even for the very first time. 

So, in conclusion, here’s the point; here’s the big question: am I just making all this up because it sounds good in a blog?  Is this just “talking the talk”?  No, what I’ve expressed (no matter how imperfectly I conveyed it) came from the soul of who I am. 

God bless,

Kevin

Three decades

In 1993, the Colorado Rockies baseball team was born.  While they have had fleeting chapters of success, they are regarded as an organization that loses more than it wins.  Weeks ago, when the Rockies 2023 season mercifully came to an end, their record was an abysmal 59-103; the worst record in their 30-year history.  Isn’t that scary (just in time for Halloween)?

Let me write out three of my favorite Rockies success moments.  To begin, I remember the first time the Rockies made it to the post-season.  Behind a potent offense of hitters like Dante Bichette, Vinny Castilla, and “The Big Cat” Andres Galarraga, Colorado enjoyed their first taste of playoffs baseball.  I can still vividly recall the Rockies commentator declaring, “The Rockies are celebrating.  They are going to the playoffs before their third birthday.”  Secondly, in the 2009 season, the Rockies posted their best record.  They won 92 games and made it to the playoffs that year. 

But my personal favorite was in 2007; this was the year that the Rockies made it to the World Series.  But it was also the memorable way that they did it.  Author Nick Groke wrote an article at Colorado Sun.com, on the 30-year journey of the Rockies; you can check it out in its entirety, if you are interested right here at this link.  Groke captures the magic of that 2007 season when he writes,

“For a month, the Rockies seemed unstoppable.  They won 21 of 22 games to reach the World Series, sweeping the Philadelphia Phillies and Arizona Diamondbacks to win the National League pennant, their first significant trophy.  But after a long wait to start the World Series, the Boston Red Sox swept them in turn, winning easily before celebrating in front of Rockies fans at Coors Field.  “Rocktober” as it came to be known, was one of the greatest runs in baseball history.”

However, hope for another World Series appearance has sadly faded.  A person could go on and on with the Rockies frequently wasted potential, or front office missteps, but Nick Groke, in the just-cited article on the Rockies three-decade journey, sums up where the Rockies find themselves as an organization today.  He quotes a Rockies fan who remarked, “If you want to see baseball played at a fairly high level, you can at least come and watch the other team.”

In the film “Back to the Future” (sorry for the proverbial sharp right turn there, but stay with me), Marty McFly went back in time thirty years, from 1985 to 1955.  I had a weird time travel scene play in my head.  I imagined how Kevin in 1993 would have reacted if Kevin from thirty years later appeared, and was told of what I am going through today.  

As I write these words, I find myself in one of the most unusual and frustrating seasons of my life.  I am on the sidelines, desiring to be put back in the game, but because of continual troubling physical issues, I’m still unable to do so.  Suffice to say, Doc Brown, the inventor of the time machine in “Back to the Future”, was right when he said no one should know too much about their future!  As disappointing as the Rockies have been (and don’t get me started on the Denver Broncos; a once mighty organization that now consistently finds different ways to lose), my hope isn’t in the Rockies or the Broncos.  My hope is in God.  The One who has the whole world, the entire universe, in His hands.  

In conclusion, I have long appreciated Danny Gokey’s 2014 song “Hope in front of me”, but after hearing it again, I can resonate with it like never before, and so I have a new love for it.  It is strengthening to hear him proclaim these words: “There’s hope in front of me.  There’s a light, I still see it.  There’s a hand still holding me, even when I don’t believe it.  I might be down but I’m not dead; there’s better days still up ahead.  Even after all I’ve seen, there’s hope in front of me.”  At the very end of the song, Danny sings directly to God; he states, “I still have hope.  You are my hope.”

God bless,

Kevin

"This is the day that the Lord has made"

It was a pleasant memory to recall that, periodically at my work, when someone would ask me how I was doing, I would answer, “It’s a great day to be alive!”  And after letting that sentiment sink in, I would add, “Of course, that’s every day, but you know what I mean.”  Now that I know that God is not done with me yet – even though a month ago I went through a particularly scary stint in the hospital – I wonder if I should say, “It’s a super great day to be alive.”  What did I say when I gave my teaser for this content earlier?  Something like I’ve been upgraded from grateful to grateful 2.0. 

Of course, I’ve started out today in a silly and giddy tone.  But the fact of the matter is, I find myself so grateful to God for the gracious opportunity to live this day.  Psalm 118:24 says, “This the day the Lord has made, we will rejoice and be glad in it.”  Longtime readers of this blog will know that every April, my family and I celebrate how God healed me from a vicious disease I had as an infant.  For years and years, my parents used to sing a song that Dad wrote expressing thankfulness to God for this momentous happening; one line states that God gave me “a future, to walk, talk and run.” 

In the same way, I will forget the feeling of relief and gratitude when I realized that, just as God had done for me in the past, once again He had spared my life.  Or, to use my dad’s line again, once again He gave me “a future, to walk, talk and run.”  The Bible states that every day we wake up is a gift from the hand of God.  Psalm 3:5 says, “I lay down and slept; I awoke, for the Lord sustained me.

Psalm 3:5 is a powerful verse, and it’s even more powerful when we see the verse in its context.  Psalm 3 is a Psalm from King David, when he was going through the horrible season of running from his own son, Absalom, who sought the take over the throne.  Verse 1 of Psalm 3 reads, “Lord, how they have increased who trouble me!”  In context, this is an intense time of suffering for the king.  But David had hope in the Lord.  And so do I.

I can imagine that some may read my words and think that I’m the male version of Pollyanna, who only sees the good, and is absolutely blind to the bad.  Not so!  Believe me, I could detail the physical and emotional suffering I’m enduring, even now as I write this.  I still haven’t returned to my normal routine, and every day presents stresses and frustrations.  But, even in the midst of this trouble, I have hope; I have a heart of worship. 

We humans think we have such control over our lives, but take it for me, that’s nothing more than an illusion.  I’m pleased that God chose to spare my life, but there will come a day – perhaps at some point decades in the future, or maybe much sooner – that I will die.  However, when this happens, I will be “present with the Lord” in Heaven, as it says in 2 Corinthians 5.  Years ago, someone at a church quoted these wonderful words in Romans 14; they came to my mind again, as I was putting all this together: “For none of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself.  For if we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord.  Therefore, whether we live or die, we are the Lord’s” (verses 7-8).  It’s all in His sovereign hands.

Brandon Lake’s melodious work entitled “Gratitude” now has an added layer of relevance to me.  “All my words fall short,” he begins.  “I’ve got nothing new.  How could I express all my gratitude?  I could sing these songs, as I often do, but every song must end, and You never do.  So I throw up my hands, and praise You again and again…I know it’s not much, but I’ve nothing else fit for a King, except for a heart singing hallelujah.  Hallelujah!”

God bless,

Kevin

Waiting on God in the midst of a deferred hope

I. Introduction

In 2020, I wrote a three-part blog series on Proverbs 13:12, which reads, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life.”  We praise God when the desire does come, when the dream come true, and rightly so.  But what do we do when the desired thing doesn’t come to pass?  What do we do when that sickness lingers on, with no healing in sight?  What happens to our hearts when that prodigal child doesn’t come home, despite praying for decades?  What happens when your longing for a spouse doesn’t come to fruition; or you can’t have children?  These are intensely real questions.  And since this subject hits me a lot differently now than when I wrote about it in 2020, here I am talking about it again.

II. Reflections

To begin, I was blessed by the words of a got questions.org article.  If you find yourself resonating with this topic, I would encourage you to read the entirety of the article, which can be found here.  The author writes, “The term deferred in the passage means “to put off” or “drag out” as in a long, drawn-out process.  Hope deferred can look like many things: a prayer of salvation for a loved one that continues year after year, an agonizing job search filled with endless interviews and rejections, a long-term battle with cancer, or a heartbreaking string of miscarriages.  As we eagerly hope for something important, and it keeps being postponed, the longing we feel can make our heart sick.”        

Candidly, I resonate with the sentiments of that article.  To be transparent with you, I have unmet dreams in my life; I know what it’s like to feel heartsick over hopes long deferred.  So I want to write a few words about it.  In fact, in many ways I’m talking to myself as I write this, and if you are helped too, that’s great. 

One thing I continually learn is that a deferred hope needs to be kept in its proper context.  In other words, it should never become more important than God Himself.  That same got questions.com article gives these helpful words: “While getting what we desire can be an excellent thing, we must not allow the pursuit of fulfillment to become a temptation to sin.  Waiting is an opportunity to trust God and allow Him to work in our hearts and strengthen our character: “But if we look forward to something we don’t have yet, we must wait patiently and confidently” (Romans 8:25, NLT; see also Romans 5:4.)  We ought to see these long stretches as opportunities to turn to God and depend on Him in our weakness (Psalm 62:1,5; 2 Corinthians 12:9-10).”

III. Illustration

I had the opportunity to re-watch the 2004 film “Spider-Man 2” (by the way, it was a month ago that I was released from that emergency room hospital; what a delight to be able to see this great movie again).  It’s striking that Peter Parker/Spider-Man learned an important lesson that is related to this topic.  Otto Octavius had the dream of creating a new form of renewable energy, by harnessing the power of a kind of miniature sun that can only be handled with four mechanical arms.  But the experiment fails, and the arms are welded to Otto’s body.  And they actually begin to take him over.

In the exciting finale, after Otto re-creates the experiment again on a much larger scale, it begins to go haywire, just as it had before.  So much so that many innocent people were in real danger.  So Peter reveals his identity to Otto and tells him that the entire project needs to be destroyed.  Otto refuses.  Peter tells him that the arms have turned him villainous.  “It was my dream,” Otto replies.  Peter answers with words that are precious to me: “Sometimes to do what’s right we have to be steady, and give up the thing we want the most.  Even our dreams.”  Ultimately, Otto repents, drowns his project, and in doing so, he selflessly sacrifices his life. 

Furthermore, Peter was willing to practice what he preached.  When Mary Jane, the woman he loved, learned his superhero identity, he told her that now she knew why they couldn’t be together.  Peter had resolved to give up his dream of being with her.  Of course, Mary Jane had a say in this.  And when MJ ran away from the man she was going to marry to Peter, and declared that she wanted to be with him, no matter the danger, Peter happily agreed (and thus we’re treated to an extremely happy ending).  But this is a layer of the film I didn’t catch initially: Peter and Otto’s resolution at the end of the film mirror each other.

IV. Conclusion

John Ortberg, in his fine book, “If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get Out of the Boat” writes, “Waiting is a good thing for people like me.  It reminds me that I am not in charge.  I’m the patient.  I’m in the waiting room.  Waiting humbles me in ways I need to be humbled.  But in the real issues of life, we are not just waiting around – we are waiting on God.  Therefore we can trust his wisdom and timing.”  He goes on to say this, at the very end of the same chapter: “what we wait for is not more important than what happens to us while we are waiting.”

God bless,

Kevin

Coming soon to this blog in October

It’s been a while since I’ve presented a “coming soon” blog, where I give you an overview on what I plan to submit to this blog in the coming days.  I do this because I’m feeling tired today, but I wanted to present something, so you’re updated and will tune in for new content.  In no particular order, here’s what I have rolling around in my brain right now:

The conclusion of the Colorado Rockies 30th season

Back in 1993, Colorado got a professional baseball team.  I’m refraining from making a joke on the Rockies lack of success for these three decades, however the sad fact is, the Colorado Rockies have had more failure than success over the years.  Whenever I compose this particular blog, I don’t just want to document their losing ways – sadly that’s a given – but I also want to reminisce on a year when the Rockies were really good.  In fact, they accomplished something no one else in major league baseball had ever done, at that point. 

“It’s a great day to be alive”

Long before my recent illness, I used to say this phrase.  Even before I lay in a hospital bed last month, closer to death’s door that I knew, I was grateful for the great gift of life.  But because my life has been spared, I guess you could say that I’m grateful 2.0.  While I’m still on the mend and far from returning to my old routine, I must write a blog soon stating just how deeply thankful I am, first and foremost to the Lord.  But also to the health care workers, doctors, and nurses that brought me back to the land of the living.  

Continuing thoughts on “Batman v Superman” film

Of course, at some point, I plan to pick up where I left off with my “Batman v Superman” thoughts.  I will speak more about the story arc of Batman in that film, but also how – I’m sorry; forgive me, but I must say it – I didn’t really like Superman’s story arc in this movie, for most of the film.  I’ll dig into that eventually too.  And I’ll bring up at some point how I think the Lex Luther character in that film is, at least in my opinion, greatly underappreciated.

Thoughts on a “hope deferred”

In 2020, I wrote about a verse from the Proverbs that speaks about how “a hope deferred makes the heart sick.”  Months prior to all of my health issues, I began to consider picking up what I had written 3 years ago, re-package it, and give us all a refresher on the topic.  This never really got off the ground, but this notion is quite applicable in 2023, and I trust it will be for you too.  Furthermore (because I’m me), I plan to use a superhero film to illustrate a deferred hope from the world of superhero cinema.

An inspiring sermon point to contemplate

I recently heard a sermon where the pastor spoke of how a 61-year-old in the congregation had recently passed away.  When this pastor met with the family to help plan the service, and process their grief, this man's daughter commented that her dad was “a man of God; he not only talked the talk, but he walked the walk.”  This pastor could not get that line of testimony out of his head; he wondered if the same sentiment could have been said for him, or anyone in the congregation, had they unexpectedly passed on. 

This was particularly relevant for me, of course, as I continue to process the recent health crisis in my life.  Could the same be said of me as that daughter said of her father?  That Kevin “not only talked the talk, but he walked the walk”?  I don’t know.  I’m not sure the shape that blog will take, but what an inspiring challenge!

So, in conclusion for today, while I’m not sure which of these 5 doors I will look into first, as it were, that’s what I intend to write about in the coming days. 

God bless you,

Kevin

Reaction Monday/ The hopeless Denver Broncos

I had a bad dream that I want to share with you.  I dreamed that the Denver Broncos played the undefeated Miami Dolphins, and the game was basically over by halftime.  In my dream, the Dolphins quarterback, Tua Tagovailoa, didn’t throw an incompletion the entire first half.  And it was 35-13 at halftime.  Then, in my dream, the decimation of the Broncos continued in the second half.  When all was said and done, the final score was one you’d expect to see in a Madden video game or something; an eye-popping 70-20.  As you know, the irony is I wasn’t dreaming: this was what actually happened yesterday. 

Congratulations to the Miami Dolphins!  That’s an offensive showing that hasn’t been seen in many decades.  Consider these numbers: 10 offensive touchdowns in one game; 5 passing, 5 rushing (first time in NFL history that feat was done).  726 yards (second most in NFL history, 10 short of the all-time record).  I also want to give a lot of credit to Miami’s coach Mike McDaniel.  There was an opportunity, late in the 4th quarter, to kick a field goal and lift their total to a NFL record 73 points.  But McDaniel showed class, sportsmanship, and mercy by having the team just take a knee, and be content with an astonishing 50-point victory.  As it was, no NFL team had scored that many points since 1966!  It was historically incredible for Miami; and an embarrassing train wreck for Denver.

In 2022, there was a renewed sense of excitement and hope in Bronco-land: The Broncos pushed all of their poker chips to the middle of the table, so to speak, to acquire quarterback Russell Wilson.  What followed was a terrible season.  I vividly remember telling a coworker one Monday last year: “another week, another embarrassing Broncos loss.”  But, after the debacle of the Nathaniel Hackett experiment, the Broncos hired a new Head Coach for 2023: Super Bowl winner Sean Payton.  This was supposed to right everything for the Broncos.  Yet today, Denver stands winless three weeks in, and living through another game that resulted in understandable national ridicule.

I thought about the Denver Broncos as an example of hopelessness.  But there are others.  Since I’ve writing about “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice”; the cinematic world of Superman portrayed by Henry Cavill has been fresh on my mind.  I was reminded about the unceremonious ending of Cavill’s career playing the Man of Steel.

In October of 2022, Henry took to social media with the news that he was going to come back as Superman.  Incidentally, this story can be found here.  With a picture of him decked out in his iconic red and blue super suit, he stated, “A very small taste of what’s to come, my friends.  The dawn of hope renewed.”  Like many others superhero fans, I would have liked to see the continued saga of Cavill’s Superman.  But a few months later, he had to announce: “I will, after all, not be returning as Superman.  After being told by the studio to announce my return back in October.”  Then with an attitude that would make Superman himself proud he continued, “This news isn’t the easiest but that’s life.  The changing of the guard is something that happens.  I respect that.”  That development can be read about here.

Sadly, what Henry Cavill called “the dawn of hope renewed”, only lasted a few months.  Therefore, whether it’s the unexpected dashed dreams of a Henry Cavill-led Superman franchise, or a football team that seems to find new ways to humiliate themselves, hope can be an elusive quest.  Hope can’t be found in worthy things like the right romantic relationship, political involvement, raising the next generation, or enduring physical health (because it can be gone in a flash; believe me, I know all about this one).  But, as surely as I’m sitting here writing this, there is hope.

The old hymn says, “My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.  I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus’ name.  On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking ground.”  One helpful resource, found here at Bible verses now.com, puts it well: “My Hope is Built on Nothing Less is an inspiring reminder that no matter what we face, our hope and trust ultimately rest in God and His love for us.  It is a source of comfort and assurance that He is always there for us, now and always.  The lyrics written by Edward Mote in 1834, convey the belief that nothing in this world can compare to the strength and constancy of God’s love and grace.”   

God bless,

Kevin  

Revisiting a maligned film (Part 1 - Introduction)

My life has been heavy lately.  And because I’ve desired to share with you what has been going on, this blog has been rather heavy too.  So I thought I would switch things up a little bit and talk about a superhero film that is worthy of revisiting.  A film that is often maligned.

Back in 2016, I wrote a two-part blog on, at the time, the new film “Batman v Superman: The Dawn of Justice”.  I basically stated that there were good elements in the movie, as well as bad elements, and then some just flat-out bizarre stuff.  However, as time went on – 7 years already; wow, how time flies! – there was something about it that bothered me, yet I couldn’t place my finger on what it was.  One day, it finally dawned on me, and this realization colored my view of this film negatively.  So, for today, I thought I would begin by addressing this specific troubling aspect of the film.

First off, believe it or not, I finished viewing the “Ultimate Edition” of “Batman v Superman” for the first time.  This is, without question, the definitive version of the film (the theatrical version cut 30 minutes out).  To refresh your memory, Superman (Henry Cavill) and Zod engaged in an epic battle in the 2013 film “Man of Steel”, which resulted in lots of collateral damage, and even loss of life.  In one of the beginning scenes of “Batman v Superman” (I’m going to begin abbreviating it to “BvS”) we see a flashback of Bruce Wayne (Ben Affleck) seeing a brief moment of their fight for himself (incidentally I submit that Affleck is excellent in this film).  Bruce sees the death of some of his employees, a direct result of the Superman/Zod battle.  While he does manage to save a little girl, she tells him that her parents were also killed as a result of the destructive fight. 

The film jumps to 18 months later, and we see discover that Bruce was deeply impacted by the chaos those months ago; it changed him.  He is angrier, vengeful, and full of rage.  He blames Superman for the death and destruction he had witnessed.  He begins branding the necks of criminals with a bat-shaped hot iron.  This raises the eyebrows of the Gotham media, and even Alfred himself (played quite well here by Jeremy Irons).  In fact, there’s a scene where Alfred drops a newspaper detailing Batman’s new habit of escalated violence, and calls Bruce out on it; he rightly calls Bruce’s actions “cruel.”  Bruce basically just shrugs it off, and says something to the effect of, “People in this world don’t stay good.”

When it finally occurred to me that this is a very different Batman – an outright murderous one – it became a negative issue I had with this film.  Of course, the Caped Crusader is in the wrong here, but for some reason, his motivation eluded me; these murders were not something that he had done for years and years (as I previously thought).  Rather, it was all brought on by the one he perceives as a threat to humanity – Superman.  Now, a person can contend that this an implausible plot point, and that’s their prerogative.  But in this movie universe of “BvS” – often referred to as the “Snyder-verse” after Director Zach Snyder – we are steeped in a realistic tone.  And realistically, if there was an alien invasion that resulted in loss of life, and you witnessed some of it, wouldn’t you would fear the alien and consider him a threat to humanity?

However, contrary to popular opinion – an opinion I too had at one point – this dire mindset of Batman’s is not the end of his story arc in this film.  To put it in a nutshell for today, after Batman finally comes to understand that he was completely wrong about Superman, he fights alongside him.  Ultimately, the Man of Steel’s heroic example shows Bruce the error of his ways; we see a changed man, both through his actions (I realize this is a debated point, I want to tackle this in more depth in the next blog), and also his words.  By the end of “BvS”, Bruce actually encourages a morose Wonder Woman (played by Gal Gadot; who was so good in this, she got two standalone movies of her own).  He resolutely declares, “Men are still good. We fight. We kill.  We betray each other.  But we can rebuild.  We can do better. We will. We have to.”

To conclude, what I’ve written today doesn’t mean that I now think this is the greatest superhero film ever made; I don’t.  I think it has glaring flaws.  But I don’t actually think this movie is as bad as the general consensus seems to convey it is.  I think it gets some hate that is unjustified.  Yes, it’s different and controversial (once again, I’ll address some of the controversy next time), but I’ve discovered you really can’t put your brain on a shelf while viewing this.  I freely admit that I was guilty of not thinking everything through that was being presented.  Today I appreciate “Batman v Superman” (or “BvS”) for what it is, glaringly obvious flaws and all.  It is to this movie universe that I plan to return to again next time.

To be continued!

God bless,

Kevin