2015: The year I will never forget

On July 4th, 2015 my boss had a team meeting scheduled.  In that meeting, he gave the surprising announcement that he was going to be leaving to pursue another opportunity that had been presented to him.  In the course of the comments he made that day he made a shrewd statement that I want to share with you today.  He said, “Life is chapters.”  When I look back, I can see how my life really does seem to be divided into various chapters.

 

What my boss didn’t know – and what no one could possibly know – was that later on that very month my dad went home to be with Jesus in Heaven.  It was an occurrence that I certainly didn’t see coming.  When I woke up that morning, I never would have envisioned that it was going to be his last day on Earth.  Dad was a model of health.  But it didn't matter.  It’s a stark reminder that when God says it’s your time, then that’s settles it.  “Life is chapters,” said my former boss.  My dad’s unexpected entrance into glory plunged the Bauer family into a chapter of grief, pain, and loss.

The magnitude of such a loss changes you forever.  C.S. Lewis, in his book “A Grief Observed” (a book where Lewis is processing the pain of his wife’s death) likened losing a loved one to having an arm amputated.  If you were to go through such an ordeal, it wouldn’t kill you, you would survive, but you’d never be the same again.  That’s a perfect illustration of how I feel.  Life will go on.  But I’m never going to be the same.

Taking photographs was one of my father's hobbies.  So, to conclude the blog for today (and the 2015 content) in honor of Dad, I thought I’d share a few of my favorite pictures with you.  Of course, there are so many more I could share.  But this is a good sampling plate.

Dad showed us all what it means for a husband to love his wife as Christ loves the church

Dad with his two boys

I love this picture so much!

Dad loved being a Grandpa.  Here he is with Anna, my niece

Dad was also a really good pianist

Attending a Colorado Rockies game.  Cherished memories!

I'll see you again one day, Dad!

The world desperately needs a savior

One of the superhero movies that has faded into obscurity is a film made back in 2006 called “Superman Returns” starring Brandon Routh and Kate Bosworth.  I’m not proposing that this is a perfect movie by any stretch of the imagination.  It has noticeable flaws.  I think it could have done a better job of explaining some of the plot points, for example.  But for all the issues this movie has there is one scene that has really stuck in my mind to this day.

In the film, Lois Lane is heartbroken because Superman left Earth for a time.  She didn’t know when or if he would ever return.  Five years passed, but he did return (hence the movie title).  Superman discovers that Lois has moved on with her life, he finds that she has a child and she is in a committed relationship with another man.  Superman is also very sad to learn that Lois has written an article (and she won a Pulitzer for it) called “Why the World Doesn’t Need Superman.”

In the aforementioned memorable scene, Superman asks Lois why she wrote such a paper.  “I moved on,” she replied.  “So did the rest of us.  That’s why I wrote it.  The world doesn’t need a savior, and neither do I.”  Later on in the scene, Superman, while flying high above the city with Lois in his arms, asks her, “What do you hear?”  She answered that she didn’t hear anything.  “I hear everything,” he responded.  “You wrote that the world doesn’t need a savior, yet every day I hear people crying out for one.”  What he was saying without directly saying it is that Lois was absolutely wrong; the world does need a savior.  It’s true in the world of superheroes, but it’s also true in real life.

In Luke 2, we read words that are so familiar we can easily miss their vast importance.  When Christ was born, an angel from Heaven announced, “There is born unto you this day, a Savior, which is Christ the Lord” (Luke 2:11; italics mine).  Further, in Matthew 1, we read that an angel conveyed to Joseph that they should name the child Jesus, because, “He will save His people from their sins.”  Yes, the world does need a savior, and His name is Jesus Christ.

What does it mean that Jesus is Savior?  The Bible tells us that humanity has a problem: sin.  We are sinners, both by inherent nature and by personal choice.  I once heard Billy Graham put it this way: “All of mankind is infected with a disease called sin.”  It’s a blight upon our souls and hearts.  The book of Romans puts it succinctly: “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”  God loves us and wants to be in friendship and fellowship with us, but our sin is repugnant and vile to Him. 

Seeing our dilemma, Jesus, Immanuel, God in human flesh, came to Earth as an infant.  He grew up, and died a violent death on a cross to pay the penalty of humanity’s sin.  He paid our “sin debt” as Charles Stanley has put it.  We’ve all accrued a massive debt to God that we could never pay, but Jesus paid it on our behalf.  I love these words from an old hymn: “Jesus paid it all.  All to Him I owe.  Sin had left a crimson stain; He washed it white as snow.”  1 Peter 3:18 says, “For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God.”  

However, this doesn’t mean that everyone is now automatically in a right relationship with God.  We have to make a conscious decision to put our faith, trust, and reliance in Jesus.  To use the Biblical terminology we have to “believe” in Jesus.  John 1:12 states, “But as many as received Him, to those who believe on His name, to them He gave the right to become children of God.”  

Let me try to illustrate this.  Yesterday, so many people had Christmas gifts placed in front of them.  But for them to actually be appropriated, they had to be accepted and received.  If not, they would simply sit there and be of no benefit whatsoever.  It’s the same with salvation from sin in Christ.  Ephesians 2 says, “It is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and that not of yourself, it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast” (italics mine).  Have you accepted God's gracious gift?

Growing up, I used to hear a sentiment in gospel tracts or sermons; it was this question: “If you died today, do you know for sure you would go to Heaven?”  I would relegate this question to nothing more than a mere hypothetical situation given to illustrate a point.  But if this year has taught me anything, it is that we don’t know when our last day on Earth will be.  Only God knows when we are going to pass away.  It could be 50 years from now, but it could be tomorrow.  We simply do not know.  I urge you, dear reader, to be ready for eternity.  I’m convinced that some of you reading these words have heard this message before, but you’ve resisted putting your faith in Christ alone to save you.  It’s time to stop fighting and submit to God.  Don’t delay.  Put your faith and trust in Jesus today.

Kevin

The destiny of Jesus Christ (part 2)

Last week, I ended my post by speaking of Jesus Christ’s atoning sacrifice on the cross for all of humanity.  Today I wanted to bring up the glorious truth that Jesus didn’t stay dead, He resurrected from the grave; victorious over death itself!  Some of you are thinking, “Wait a minute.  Kevin, why are you talking about the resurrection?  Why not focus on Jesus’ birth instead?  Today isn’t Easter, it’s Christmas.”

I understand your confusion.  Make no mistake: I am certainly very grateful for the Christmas narrative (and I want to wish all of you a Merry Christmas).  I love the plan God had in bringing about the birth of Jesus.  But this year, I've decided to convey that Christmas, as wonderful as it is, was really just the beginning; so much more occurred after Jesus was born in a manger.  For instance, Jesus performed astonishing miracles.  He delivered the most amazing teachings.  But the time came when Jesus voluntarily chose to give His life by means of crucifixion on a cross.  Then His lifeless body was placed in a tomb.

But His destiny didn’t end there.  Jesus rose from the grave; He who was dead was alive again!  Furthermore, Jesus spoke of His post-cross destiny.  He repeatedly predicted to His disciples that He was going to be killed, but that He would be resurrected (see Matthew 20:17-19 for just one example of this).  Interestingly, after Jesus was crucified, the chief priests and Pharisees go to Pilate and they tell him that Jesus had predicted that He was going to rise again in three days (read it for yourself; it’s Matthew 27:62-63).  Even they knew the predictions Jesus had made!  

Let me shift gears and move to some personal application.  Yes, Jesus resurrected from the dead, but does it make a difference in life?  To put it succinctly, it makes a huge difference!  Regular readers of this blog already know that 2015 has been a year of pain and loss for me and for the Bauer family.  While the Biblical truths regarding a Christian’s hope after death were important to me before, they have washed over me in a whole new way this year.

Take 1 Thessalonians 4 for example.  In verse 16, Paul writes, “The dead in Christ will rise first.”  It’s remarkable to think about this: because Jesus conquered death, a future bodily resurrection is assured for our dearly departed loved ones in Christ.  Please don’t misunderstand me.  This doesn’t mean that when a person dies they just go through a soul sleep.  The people that teach this concept are wrong.  The Bible says that for the believer who passes away, to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord (2 Corinthians 5:8).

But one day, that body will be raised again.  An article from the website compelling truth.org puts it this way, “In summary, the dead in Christ are believers who have already died.  However, these believers now dwell in God’s presence, will one day receive a new, glorified body, and will be reunited with all believers living today at the moment of His return.  Though the death of a believer produces sadness for those who remain, we can take joy in the fact that they live on with the Lord and that we who believe will one day see them again” (please check out the full article in the link I’ve included below).  I don’t know how I would have endured the pain, heartache, and sorrow of this year if I didn’t have this truth to hold onto!

1 Corinthians 15:19 says, “If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men.”  Because Jesus arose from the grave, I know that death itself has been defeated.  I know that death isn’t the end.  I know that I will see my dad one day again in Heaven.  What a glorious reunion that will be!  Later on in 1 Corinthians 15, Paul writes, “Death has been swallowed up in victory.  Where O death, is your victory?  Where O death, is your sting?...But thanks be to God!  He gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ” (verses 54-55, 57-58).

Kevin

http://www.compellingtruth.org/dead-in-Christ.html

The destiny of Jesus Christ

One of the interesting aspects of the superhero genre for me is the origin story.  The origin story is almost like the prologue before the main event.  For example, a young Bruce Wayne witnesses his parents brutally murdered right before him.  This forever changes the course of his life.  He wants to pursue justice.  It takes him decades, but he ultimately puts on a cape and cowl and becomes Batman.  But that’s only his origin story.  Any superhero has a story of their humble origins, but it’s only the beginning act.  Many battles are still going to be fought.

In a similar way, the account of Christmas is really just an origin story.  Mary, although a virgin, is used by God to give birth to the Savior of the world, Jesus Christ.  By the way, don’t forget Joseph’s role in all this.  He was Mary’s devoted husband, who was also used mightily by God.  How could Mary have done everything she was called to do alone?  The answer is she couldn’t; so God provided Joseph to her.  But so many seem to believe that the entire saga ends with Jesus in a manger; this is simply not the case.  This was only the beginning, the prologue, the origin story.  Jesus grew up and lived out His destiny.

What was Jesus’ destiny?  From the moment Jesus was born in that manger, it was His destiny to give His life on a cross to pay the penalty of the sin of mankind.  Why would His death accomplish this?  Because Jesus is God incarnate, or to put it in simpler terms, God in human flesh.  Every Christmas we hear these words, and it’s easy for us to gloss over them, but listen to this again.  “All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin shall be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel – which means, “God with us.”” (Matthew 1:22).

Jesus was fully man, He was also fully God.  Immanuel – God with us.  That’s why His sacrifice on the cross is so important.  Only Jesus, the God-man, could take on the role of sin-bearer for mankind’s sin.  This Christmas season, I’m remembering Jesus’ sacrifice made for you and me, out of pure love.  Let me illustrate this:

I was so intrigued by a storyline in a recent episode of “The Flash”.  Two villains teamed up and hatched a near perfect plan.  They placed one hundred bombs throughout the city.  They threatened to detonate them and murder thousands of innocent people.  But what they actually wanted to do was destroy The Flash.  Check out this choice they give to the hero.

“Here’s how it’s going to be: you are going to stand there, and let me end you, very publicly and very painfully, and I’ll let everybody live.  But if I see if a little flicker of electricity on you [in other words, if he attempts to run], casket makers in this town are going to have a very merry Christmas.  So, Flash, what’s it going to be?”  Selflessly and heroically, The Flash concedes and lets the villains pummel him.  Blow after blow hits him, and even though he has the power to fight back or flee, he doesn’t.

As I watched this unfold, I was thinking, “He intends to give his life as savior for the city.”  Ultimately, The Flash doesn’t die.  Thanks to the quick thinking of his friends, the bombs were diffused; the crisis was averted.  But I hesitate to even mention that detail.  The fact is, he was ready to give his life for the citizens he loves.  This is a Christ-like scene.  Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrated His love for us in this: While we were still sinners Christ died for us.”  1 John 2:2 says that Jesus is “the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours, but also for the sins of the whole world.”  I am so thankful for Jesus’ atoning sacrifice on the cross for my sin.  Without that, I would have no hope.

Kevin 

"Blue Christmas"

Some of you may be wondering why I haven’t devoted a blog to the Christmas season yet.  After all, in previous years of this blog most, if not all, of December’s posts had a Christmas theme.  While the Christmas content is still coming later, this year is different.  This year is painful.  In fact, I wish I could go to sleep, wake up the next morning, and have it magically be January of 2016.  It’s difficult to walk out these days leading up to Christmas because my dad is no longer with us.

It’s difficult for several reasons, but let me give you just one example: my father loved Christmas and he loved music (as a matter of fact he even wrote his own Christmas song).  Thus it is not easy to hear Christmas music.  Which, of course, presents a problem: trying to avoid hearing Christmas music is nearly impossible as it is everywhere at this time of year.  One of the songs that I find myself resonating with is Elvis Presley’s song “Blue Christmas.”  He sings about how he will have a “blue Christmas” without his loved one.  Similarly, it will be a blue Christmas for me without my dad.

Check out this passage from the Bible: “Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not.  They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness” (Lamentations 3:22-23).  Most know these words, or at least that last phrase “Great is Your faithfulness.”  But not everyone knows that the book of Lamentations is the prophet Jeremiah lamenting the extremely difficult circumstances God had permitted.  Jeremiah is in the midst of intense pain, sorrow, and heartache.  For example, consider how just a few verses earlier, he says that God has “made me walk in darkness and not light” (Lamentations 3:2).  In verse 5, he says that God has “surrounded me with bitterness and woe.”  Verse 17: “You [God] have moved my soul far from peace; I have forgotten prosperity.”

But then in verse 21, his tune changes; he says, “This I recall to mind, therefore I have hope.”  He goes on to say what I’ve already cited in verses 22 and 23.  Context is crucial in the Bible.  The context of the monumental statement of God’s faithfulness is that, even in the midst of this intensely emotional, gut-wrenching, heartbreaking, agonizing pain, Jeremiah can still honestly declare that God is faithful.  I can say the same thing for myself.  Even though this is a “blue Christmas” God has never ceased to be faithful to me.  Great is His faithfulness!

Kevin

Thanksgiving thoughts

In 2013, I wrote a Thanksgiving blog that I titled “Thanking God even when life hurts”.  It was appropriate for me to write such a blog back then, and it is certainly appropriate for me to revisit that theme again this year.  Life does hurt.  Quite frankly, I have not been looking forward to the holidays.  To face these beloved holidays without my dad for the first time in my life is a very daunting task.

But as I think about it, even in the midst of a painful 2015, I can still see numerous abundant blessings that God has showered upon me.  For example, there’s an interesting verse tucked away in the book of Daniel.  Daniel 5:23 says that God holds our breath in His hands.  Has 2015 been a difficult year for you?  Are you having trouble compiling a list of things to be thankful for?  How about starting by thanking God that He graciously gives you breath every day?  The Bible declares that it is God Himself who provides breath to humanity.  Incidentally, this is true both for the believer and for the non-believer.

At one point in that 2013 blog, I wrote these words: “But, even in the midst of the turmoil, my faith and trust in God is the thing that sustains me and keeps me going.  Even in the midst of the chaos, I have hope.  I have gratitude in my heart to God.  Why?  Because He alone is in full control, no matter what.  Ephesians 1:11 tells us that God “works out everything in conformity to the purpose of his will.”  Certainly that doesn’t mean that we will always understand why God allows specific things to happen…but, despite this, God’s will, plan, and purpose is superior, and it will ultimately prevail.”

Kevin

The incredible power of words

Last week, due to a sickness, I lost my voice.  It was interesting to try to go about all my responsibilities while not being able to communicate very well.  When you go through something like this it teaches you not to take fully functioning vocal cords for granted.  Believe me, when you compile your Thanksgiving list of things you are thankful for perhaps you should include be able to speak because it really is a gift.

As I was going through all this, I found an interesting Bible verse from the book of Proverbs.  It reads, “The words of the reckless pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18).  It’s such a shame that, although we have such a marvelous gift of speech, we often squander it by speaking words that belittle other people.  Unkind words certainly do pierce like a sword.

The Bible gives us this prescription: “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (Ephesians 4:29).  Speak words that encourage, build up, and help others.  In the midst of my unusual week, someone thanked me for my years of service at Chick-fil-A.  I was so encouraged by those words.  I was inspired afresh to use my tongue to edify others, rather than speaking words that demean, belittle and injure.

Kevin

The surprises of life

Have you ever had a day that unfolds completely differently than the way you originally envisioned it?  This happened to me recently.  I had a day that significantly differed from how I planned it.  I’ll spare you the particulars, but there were three important stops lined up.  One event ended up taking most of the day; another stop was rescheduled altogether; only one ended up unfolding with a semblance of how it was drawn up.  You try to be flexible, and keep in mind that, for better or worse, things don’t always go as you planned that they would.

This is really a good lesson for life as well.  Barry Allen, on the TV show “The Flash” recently said, “Everyone secretly thinks they’ve figured out what their life is going to be like.  But what no one ever considers is that life has its own plans for you; whether you like them or not.  And so you are left with a choice: you can either embrace the change and move forward, or fight it and be left behind.”  I resonated with this quote when I first heard it, so I wrote it out and I refer to it often.  It’s true.  You think you have your life figured out, but something happens, and suddenly, the landscape of your life looks completely different.

If you’ve spent any time with me on this blog before, you know that I wholeheartedly believe in God’s sovereignty, that He is in complete control.  Furthermore, you know full well that I’ve had to rest on the notion of God’s sovereignty as I walk a path of heartache and loss that I never envisioned I would have to walk.  God, in His sovereign will, knew that my life was going to change dramatically in 2015.  But rather than angrily shake my fist at God, I find it’s better to bow to His will, even – perhaps I should say especially – if His will includes pain.  

Kevin

Thoughts on two weekend sports events

Last night was quite a memorable sports night!  To begin with, the Denver Broncos defeated the Green Bay Packers on Sunday Night Football by a score of 29-10.  But that score is a bit misleading.  It felt like the final score was 39-3.  Denver dominated in every facet of the game.  The Broncos offense racked up over 500 yards; the Broncos defense limited that potent Packers offense to something like 140 total yards.  Aaron Rodgers threw for 77 yards (the lowest of his career).  In short, it was a great game for the Denver Broncos!

Some people might disagree with me, but I think that Broncos victory was a statement game.  Many didn’t expect Denver to win this game.  In fact, the Packers were favored to win.  My take was that the Packers were (and are) a very formidable opponent.  I saw this game as a chance to gauge just how good the Broncos really are.  They came out and played their best game of the year.  The Broncos made a clear statement last night.  They said that they are for real.  They said that they are a legitimate Super Bowl contender.

Speaking of world championships, congratulations to the Kansas City Royals!  They came from behind last night and ultimately defeated the New York Mets 7-2 (in 12 innings).  This win gave the Royals their first World Series victory in 30 years.  I’m so impressed with the Royals.  They never gave up, no matter how bleak things may have looked at times, they continued to fight to the end.  They showed such tenacity, determination, and perseverance.

Many have pointed to the Mets decision to keep pitcher Matt Harvey in the game in the 9th inning, when clearly the initial plan was to go to the bullpen.  Harvey talked his way into the pitching the 9th and he proceeded to give up two runs in that inning to tie the game.  It’s easy to assign blame now, but that’s only because of the benefit of hindsight.  The way I look at it, the Royals would have found a way to win, regardless of the pitcher they were facing.  They were relentless.  So, once again, congratulations to the Royals!

Kevin

Remembering an interesting day

I missed blogging about it on the actual day, but October 21st was ‘Back to the Future Day.’  It was dubbed this because in the movie “Back to the Future: Part 2” Marty McFly (played by Michael J. Fox) and Emmett Brown (Christopher Lloyd) traveled to the future.  They jumped forward from the year 1985 to October 21, 2015.  It is comical how wrong the filmmakers were in their projection of how the future was going to be.  Yes, they got some things right (for example, 3D technology was a major presence in Back to the Future’s version of 2015; that one was certainly predicted correctly), but by and large, they were very wrong; I could list 15 examples of this.

One of the aspects of the 2015 in “Back to the Future” that many people found fascinating in the days leading up to 10/21 was the Chicago Cubs.  In the movie, Marty is surprised by an announcement that the Chicago Cubs had won the World Series.  They had swept the Miami Gators to win a world championship.  Incidentally, that’s one thing the film was correct on: when the movie came out there was no Major League baseball team in Miami.  But there is now.  It’s not the Miami Gators, it’s the Miami Marlins.  Plus, the Marlins are a National League team, meaning the Cubs couldn’t play them in the World Series, but still, that’s a point for the writers for getting that prediction correct.

The reason this was so interesting is because in real life the Chicago Cubs were trying very hard to fulfill the “Back to the Future” prophecy.  The Cubs made it all the way to the NLCS (National League Championship Series).  Unfortunately, the Cubs were unable to advance to the World Series.  The New York Mets played the role of spoiler for millions of “Back to the Future” fans by defeating the Cubbies.  Ironically, it was on ‘Back to the Future Day’ that the Mets defeated the Cubs 8-3 to complete a sweep of the Cubs and advance to the World Series.  The fact that they were swept is significant because, once again, in the film the Cubs had swept the Miami Gators.  In real life, they were swept by the Mets.  And sadly, the heartache longsuffering Cubs fans continues.

Another thing that I find fascinating is the team that the New York Mets will be playing in the World Series.  The Kansas City Royals defeated the Toronto Blue Jays to advance to the big game.  The last time the Royals won the World Series was back in October of 1985 (someone may want to point out that the last time the Royals were in the World Series was just last year.  It’s true.  But they haven’t actually won it since the 80’s.).  I’m bringing all this up because my dad was born and raised in Kansas City.  With all due respect to Mets fans, I’m rooting for the Royals.  If Kansas City does win the World Series, it might even make my dad smile in Heaven.  Who knows?

Kevin

A liberating fact

Not long ago, I was reminded of a special episode on the TV show “Home Improvement” starring Tim Allen as Tim Taylor.  John Binford, the man who gave Tim a job as the main star of “Tool Time” passed away unexpectedly.  John was not only Tim’s boss, but he was also a father figure to him.  This was a big deal because Tim Taylor’s dad passed away when he was 11 years old.  Jill, Tim’s wife, grieved by shedding many tears; Tim however wasn’t crying.  Jill was frustrated at Tim’s lack of emotion.  So, as usual when he didn’t know what to do, Tim talked to his faceless neighbor, Wilson (OK, technically he isn’t faceless; but it is true that you never saw Wilson’s face on the show, it was covered from view, usually by the fence).

Tim confessed to Wilson, “When my dad died, I remember being really sad, but I don’t remember crying.”  At one point in their conversation, Wilson said, “Tim, you have to find a way to grieve.”  And Tim did just that.  I find this episode fascinating.  One of the things I think it illustrates is a very important and liberating fact: everyone grieves differently.

In the early days after my dad’s passing, the funeral home gave me a book written by David Kessler entitled “When a Parent Dies: Dealing with the Loss of your Mother or Father”.  At one point in the book, Kessler wrote, “Some of us tend to feel that our way of grieving is the right way.  We think others should grieve like we do.  Regardless of the grief we feel, we usually fall toward one end of the pendulum or the other.  We are either “grieving the right way (our way)” or judging ourselves that we are grieving the wrong way.”

I have encountered some well-meaning people who prescribe what they feel is the correct way to grieve.  No, they haven’t had the audacity to declare, “Kevin, you aren’t grieving correctly,” but they have still sent me the message that I had better experience this and that in my grief, otherwise, something is wrong.  I disagree.  I think this is an incorrect mindset.

If you go down this path, you can easily frustrate yourself because you’ll be tempted to compare yourself with others.  For example, a friend of mine lost his father and he said for a long period of time - five years - he couldn’t bear the thought of hearing his dad’s voice.  This differed from my own grieving experience.  But that doesn’t mean that my friend was wrong and I was right, it simply reinforces the idea that everyone grieves in their own way.  As Kessler put it in another part of the book, “the truth is that our grief is as individual as our lives.”

Kevin

A patently absurd notion

There’s a notion floating around in Christian circles that I don’t agree with.  The concept is as follows: if you are going through a trial, it must be something that you can adequately handle on your own, because God, as the teaching goes, will never give a Christian more than they can bear.  Once again, I disagree with this assertion.  I think such a statement is patently absurd.

The verse that many people quote as proof of this concept is 1 Corinthians 10:13.  This verse reads, “No temptation has overtaken you except as is common to man; but God is faithful.  He will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it” (NKJV).  But this verse is speaking about temptation, not trials.  Let me elaborate.

We are being told that God won’t allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able.  In times of temptation, the promise of the Word of God is, God will make a way of escape (whether we choose to avail ourselves of that escape is another matter, but that’s a blog topic for another day).  My point here is that 1 Corinthians 10:13, and its context, is speaking of resisting temptation, not on the severity of the trials of life.  Make no mistake: God will absolutely allow you to experience trials that are much more than you can bear.

Why should we think otherwise?  Tell Job that God won’t allow you to experience trials that are too much to endure.  Tell the families of the victims who were brutally slain in Oregon earlier this month - in another tragic school shooting - that God won’t allow you to experience a trial that is too much to bear.  Tell this to the couple who will never meet their child because he or she was a stillborn.  Tell this to the widow who enjoyed marriage with the love of her life for forty years, but now has to live life feeling as if an integral part of her as been torn away (yes, I am talking about my mom losing my dad).

I will say it again: God will allow us to go through crushing, intense, unbearable trials; trials that are much more than we can bear on our own.  Why?  To drive us to Him!  C.S. Lewis once said, “Pain insists upon being attended to.  God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” 

Kevin

Contemplating God's protection and presence

Psalm 18:30 says, “As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the Lord is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him” (NKJV).  There’s a lot in this verse, but for today I want to focus on that last phrase: “He is a shield to all who trust in Him.”  I love the idea that God shields us.  The fact of the matter is protection is from God.  The Lord protects us from so much.  We really don’t even know all the ways that we are protected.  In fact, many of us are completely unaware of the numerous ways that God protects us.

H. Michael Brewer, in his book, “Who Needs a Superhero? Finding Virtue, Vice, and What’s Holy in the Comics” tells this story: “One day while sitting at my kitchen table I noticed a praying mantis inside on the windowsill, apparently carried in with some garden vegetables.  The attention of the mantis was fixed on an ant on the other side of the window glass.  The ant crept innocently along the glass on the outside while the mantis stalked it on the inside.  Again and again the mantis lunged for the ant, only to bounce off the glass.  Eventually the ant disappeared from view and the forlorn mantis stared after it in perplexity.  I wonder how many times I have been that oblivious ant while God shielded me from danger I never suspected.”

I’m sure someone has formulated this response to what I’ve said so far: “God is a shield?  That’s a laugh.  Maybe that’s true for some people, but not for me.  God didn’t shield me from the most intense pain and suffering of my life.  Why didn’t God protect me from this?”  If these past few months have taught me anything, they have taught me that the storms of life can unexpectedly rock your world in ways you never thought it could be rocked.  Trust me I know pain and suffering in a way that I never did before.

Therefore, let me state this clearly: the verses that speak of God being a shield does not mean that God will magically protect humanity from all pain, tribulation, or hardship.  The Bible is very clear that living on this planet actually means just the opposite; it means facing difficulty, adversity, and heartache.  For just one example of this, read John 16:33; Jesus said, “In this world, you will have trouble.”

H. Michael Brewer, in the same book that I quoted from before also wrote: “Surely we cannot claim that God always protects the faithful from pain and death.  A skeptic may claim that God’s protection is like a cheap insurance policy that only covers us when we don’t need it.  But even if God doesn’t exempt us from every calamity, this doesn’t disprove the reality of God’s shielding presence in life.”  Later on in the same chapter, he writes, “God may not always stand between us and the storm, but at the very least God will always stand beside us through the storm.”

That’s what I hold on to.  I don’t naively think that something is wrong because I’m experiencing distressing circumstances (that’s just a byproduct of living on Earth).  I’m holding on to the truth that God is always with me.  In Isaiah 43:2, God says, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.”  Jesus declared, “I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”  Psalm 23:4 asserts, “Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me.”

Kevin

God knows

I think some people have a picture of God as this detached, cold, and indifferent deity; a god that is unmoved by the troubles of humanity.  Or perhaps they believe God is too busy or distracted to notice their private pain.  I can envision someone, with tears streaming down their cheeks, angrily crying out in frustration, “God, don’t you see that I’m in pain?  Do you even care?”  The answer to that emotional question is a resounding yes.  God sees, knows, and understands your immense suffering.  The reason I know this is because that’s what the Bible says.

Psalm 56:8 has been an important verse to me, but now that I’m in this new season of life without my dad it is very near and dear to my heart.  This verse reads, “You keep track of my sorrows.  You have collected all my tears in your bottle.  You have recorded each one in your book” (NLT). So you are in a room in your house and the tears begin to flow.  You think you are alone and that no one sees these tears but the truth is God sees them.

 

Do you think that God is ignorant of your tears, or that God is oblivious to your pain?  Hear the word of the Lord.  “You keep track of my sorrows.  You have collected all my tears in your bottle.  You have recorded each one in your book.”  The Bible says that God is intimately aware of every single shed tear.  Not one escapes His notice.  God isn’t so busy with the big calamities of this world that He somehow missed the pain you are in.  God knows.

Furthermore, I've been thinking about Jesus' attitude and demeanor as He interacted with His friends Mary and Martha, regarding the death of their brother, Lazarus.  Look at these words from John 11: “When Jesus saw her [that is, Mary] weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, He was deeply moved in spirit and troubled” (John 11:33; NIV).  Underscore that.  Underline it.  Jesus was moved in His spirit and troubled by the pain of His friends.  
In verse 34, Jesus asks where they laid the body of Lazarus, they show Him; upon seeing him, the text says, “Jesus wept” (John 11:35).  This is the shortest verse in all the Bible, but it's a wonderful verse, particularly when you understand its context.  Someone will point out that Jesus ultimately revives Lazarus.  It's true.  But don’t miss the fact that Jesus, God incarnate (God in human flesh), wasn’t indifferent to the pain of others.  Don’t think that God is indifferent to your pain, either.

Kevin

Bittersweet holiday number 2

I’ve previously talked about the 2002 TV show “Birds of Prey”.  I'm well aware that this show has its flaws, but I still enjoy it for a lot of reasons.  One of those reasons is Dinah Meyer's portrayal of the character of Barbara Gordon A.K.A. Oracle.  She is spot on.

In an episode entitled “Lady Shiva” Barbara comments to Alfred that she is no longer the hero that she once was (meaning she is no longer Batgirl, thanks to a bullet from the Joker).  Alfred surprises Barbara by responding, “Thank goodness.”  He explains, “Batgirl was strong, but impetuous.”  He goes on to speak about how she has matured since those Batgirl days; she now had, as he put it, “a capacity to care more for others than you do for yourself.  Now if that’s not a hero I don’t know what is.”

The reason I’m bringing this up is because today is another bittersweet day.  Today would have been my dad’s 61st birthday.  As I was thinking about how to honor his memory on this day, one of the things that came to my mind was Alfred’s apt description of a hero.  Let me quote it once again; he said a hero is someone who has “a capacity to care more for others than you do for yourself.”  My dad did that.  He rarely took time for himself because he was so focused on the needs of others.  My father was clearly a hero in every sense of the word.

Dad, on this special birthday blog, I want to tell you that we can feel your absence.  We see afresh everything that you did for your family, friends, and coworkers.  Your unexpected homecoming has created a void, and a hole in our hearts.  We miss you.  I miss you.  But I know that I will see you again one day in Heaven.  Until then, in the strength of the Lord, I will press on.

Kevin

"To whom shall we go?"

I can imagine some are tempted to ask me, “Kevin, in the last blog you mention trusting God, even in the midst of this intense pain you’re experiencing.  Why have you chosen to do this?  After all, God took your dad.  Why trust God?  Why not blame Him, and get angry at Him?”

First of all, let me say that I’m well aware that everyone grieves differently.  No two people mourn in the same exact same way.  Some may develop intense anger at God when a loved one passes away.  While I don’t think it’s healthy to stay there, God is big enough to handle that anger.

Having said that, let me state that I’m clinging to God, not lashing out in anger at Him.  This new road isn’t one I would have chosen for myself, but I choose to trust God because I believe His will is superior.  So did my dad.  He concluded his prayers with a phrase that Jesus taught us to pray in the Lord’s Prayer: “Thy will be done” (Matthew 6:10; KJV).  My mom has said, ““Thy will be done” is really hard sometimes.”  I agree.  But the Lord saw fit for Dad to have his “homecoming” when no one would ever have predicted it was about to happen (including Dad himself).  God’s ways and thoughts are high above my ways and thoughts.  I say to the Lord, “Thy will be done.”

 

In John 6, Jesus speaks such difficult truths that we read in verse 66 “from this time many of His disciples went back and walked with Him no more.”  Verse 67: “Then Jesus said to the twelve, “Do you also want to go away?”  Peter gives a wonderful answer, he says, “Lord, to whom shall we go?  You have the words of eternal life.”  Amen!  Where else am I going to go in this midst of this pain, sorrow, and suffering?  I’m going to run to God.  Without Him, I’m sunk.  Psalm 73:26 is a verse that has meant a lot to me over the years, and it means even more now; it reads, “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

Kevin      

Blog words revisited

I don’t make it a habit of re-submitting entire blog installments that I’ve previously written, but I read a blog that I wrote back in October of 2014 entitled “Trusting in God’s sovereignty” that I feel must be shared again.  Here’s what I wrote that day:

‘The other day, I was watching a morning talk show.  They were interviewing a star of a new hit TV show.  This person was asked if the cast knew what was eventually going to happen to their characters for the season.  She answered that they don’t know what is going to happen, just like the viewers.  She added that this was difficult for her because she is, by nature, a person who likes to be in control, but in this case, she can’t.  Then she stated that she has learned to “trust the writers,” because they are good at their job.

That phrase that she used of trusting the writers has subsequently been stuck in my head ever since I heard it.  I’ve been applying it to my Christian life.  I’ve never actually read the book “What God Writes Your Life Story” by Eric and Leslie Ludy, but I love the picture that this title brings.  As a Christian man who has submitted his life to God, it is the Lord Himself who composes the chapters of my life story.  I desire for Him to write my life story the way He deems best.

Believe me, this is easy to say, but harder to live out.  There have been times where I look at certain episodes in my life, and candidly, I question why God chose to compose that section of my life story in that particular way.  This is where trust comes in.  Even when life isn’t easy, I have to decide afresh to put my trust in God, the writer of my life story.  He knows what is best.’

I find these words quite relevant as I think about how my life dramatically changed when my dad passed away.  You probably already know this, but even in the midst of this very painful trial in my life, I choose to put my trust in God.  Does this mean that I’m giddy over the direction God has taken my life?  Of course not.  This is sorrow, pain, and suffering unlike anything I’ve ever felt before.  But I trust in God and His plan for me, no matter what.  I echo the words of the Psalmist: “I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust” (Psalm 91:2).

Kevin

Bittersweet holiday number 1

As I have contemplated a life without my father, one of the things I personally have not been looking forward to is holidays.  As wonderful as Christmas is, for example, I can envision that it is during these occasions that one can especially feel the absence of the dearly departed loved one.  Today is the first holiday for the Bauer family.  Today is Mom and Dad’s wedding anniversary.  Because of this, this is obviously a rather hard day.

A friend recently shared a fitting statement with me.  He explained that he came up with this phrase many years ago, as he walked through death and loss in his life.  He said, “Smile while you cry.”  That’s what I want to do.  In fact, I asked him if I could use that statement, and he agreed.  Let me repeat it: “Smile while you cry.”  Smile as you look back and think of the wonderful memories, (and smile at how Dad is enjoying the incredible wonders of Heaven).  But obviously there are numerous tears as well.

In an attempt to “smile while I cry” I want to focus on the wonderful marriage that my parents enjoyed.  In fact, last year, I devoted a blog to the fact that it was my parent’s 40th anniversary.  Mom and Dad were able to have many anniversary celebrations.  Not only this, they were also able to have decades and decades of wedded bliss together.  They were very much in love.  They had a strong, stable marriage that many couples only dream of having.  In fact – as I said in my blog this time last year – their marriage was an inspiration not only to me, but also to many others as well.

Conversely, as I’ve already said, now that the Bauer family is walking this road of loss, today is a bittersweet day.  Please continue to pray for my mom.  This whole ordeal has been hard on all of us, but I think it affects her the most.  She recently said that the days are not getting easier, they are getting harder.  I imagine that this day will be an especially difficult day for her.

Kevin

"Father to the fatherless"

In Psalm 68, we read, “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling” (verse 5; NIV).  I found a helpful article from the website got questions.org.  This article is answering the question why God is called a “father to the fatherless.”  I’m not going to quote the whole thing here (I will have a link below), but check out this paragraph.

“He presents himself as a Father because we all know what a father is and does.  Even if we did not have earthly fathers who treated us well, we have an intrinsic understanding of what a good father should be.  God planted that understanding in our hearts.  We all have a need to be loved, cherished, protected, and valued.  Ideally, an earthly father will meet those needs, but even if he doesn’t, God will.  Jesus taught His followers to address God as Father (Luke 11:2).  Throughout Scripture, God describes His love for us as that of a caring parent (Isaiah 49:15; John 16:26-27; 2 Corinthians 6:18).  Although He possesses characteristics of both father and mother (Isaiah 66:13), He chooses the masculine word because it denotes strength, protection, and provision (Psalm 54:4).”

I had the thought that someone came across this blog for the very first time because you were drawn to the concept of God being a father to the fatherless.  Perhaps your dad has recently died.  Perhaps your father has been completely absent and detached from your life.  Whatever the case may be, it’s not an accident that God led you to this blog.  Not because my words are great, but because God’s Word is great.  The Bible explicitly states that God is a father to the fatherless.  He will fill the void that your earthly father’s absence has created.

Perhaps you are thinking, “How do you know that?”  I know it because God’s path for my life was for my wonderful father’s earthly existence to end last month at the age of 60.  We still have no idea why this occurred aside from the broad answer that it was the time God predetermined before he was even born (see Psalm 139:16).

 

My dad was a great dad.  He was always ready at a moment’s notice to help me in whatever way I needed help.  But now that he is gone, I have noticed that God really is a “father to the fatherless.” I love that last sentence in that got questions.org article that I cited earlier.  It reads, “He chooses the masculine word because it denotes strength, protection, and provision.”  Throughout this whole dark, trying, painful season, God has shown that He is strong, He is protector, and He is provider.

Kevin

http://www.gotquestions.org/father-to-the-fatherless.html

Brief clarification

I think I know what some of you might be thinking.  You’ve seen that I’ve given my father some very high compliments in this blog.  I’ve called my dad things like a superhero and servant.  Thus, some of you have concluded that because I am without Dad now, I am guilty of idealizing him while being completely blinded to his faults.  This is simply not so.

I had the privilege of spending a lot of time with my dad.  I can say with confidence that I knew him well.  Therefore, I am well aware of his warts, faults, and shortcomings.  The things that I have said about my dad’s character are true.  He really was a wonderful man of God.  However, by saying these things, I’m not suggesting that he was some sort of a super-saint who lived a life free from, “the sin that so easily besets us” (the old King James version’s rendering of Hebrews 12).  My father had struggles with sin, just like everyone else.  The Bible says, "If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us" (1 John 1:8).

Having freely admitted this, it is also undeniable that my father was growing in holiness and becoming more and more Christ-like as he was living out his last days on this Earth.  I could tell you stories to illustrate.   Dad completed his race with such qualities as integrity, faithfulness, and humility.  No, he wasn’t perfect, but he was overcoming, through the power of Jesus Christ.

Kevin  

The delights of Heaven

Because of recent events, I’ve been contemplating Heaven a lot.  I decided to look back at the various times I’ve highlighted Heaven in this blog.  I had fun doing so.  For example, in July of 2014, I wrote a blog entitled “Heaven: a place of bliss and happiness.”  In that blog I tried to dash the erroneous notion that Heaven is a boring place.  In Luke 23, Jesus actually calls Heaven “paradise”; the word “paradise” doesn’t really conjure up images of boredom, does it?

In that same blog, I also explained that not everyone goes to Heaven.  I’m not going to spend a lot of time on this notion today, but I did want to briefly mention it so that I’m not misunderstood.  Don’t buy into the erroneous idea that everybody in the whole wide world will ultimately access Heaven’s gates; the Bible never teaches that.  It is only reserved for those who have put their faith and trust in Jesus Christ.

In February of 2012, I used a scene from “The Wizard of Oz” to try to illustrate how wonderful Heaven is.  In the beginning, the movie is in black and white, but when Dorothy firsts arrives in Oz, she sees everything in brilliant color.  Plus, there is beautiful music playing.  I pointed out that while this scene isn’t the perfect illustration of Heaven - for instance, Dorothy immediately wanted to leave Oz - I hope it is a helpful mental picture for you, nevertheless.  

Heaven is going to be outstanding.  It will have beautiful sights, fantastic refrains of music, and various other amazing delights that are on a much higher level of anything our finite brains have ever experienced.  Oz's beauty, in stark contrast to Kansas, helps capture Heaven's incredible beauty in my brain, hopefully it does for yours as well.

In September of 2014, Truett Cathy went to be with the Lord; I blogged the news.  My words that day helped me as I contemplate this new chapter of my life now.  I talked about how there are men in Heaven that I will see again one day.  I mentioned my Grandfather, Pastor Rick Ferguson, and Truett Cathy.  I concluded that blog with words from an old hymn.  These words are like healing balm to me; they are as follows: “When we all see Jesus what a day of rejoicing that will be!  When we all see Jesus, we’ll sing and shout the victory!”

Kevin

Some things you shouldn't say to a grieving person

There’s an interesting verse tucked away in Job 2.  Job has endured the worst episode of suffering in his life.  He has essentially lost everything he had except for his life.  As the dust finally starts to settle, we read that three of Job’s friends want to support, encourage, and comfort him.  What do they do?  Job 2:13: “Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights.  No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.”

 

Did you get that?  Nobody said anything to Job; they simply supported him by being with him.  There’s great wisdom in this approach.  In fact, the second they began to open their mouths they just made everything worse.  They began to articulate that they knew why such calamity came upon Job.  Essentially, they each put their foot in their mouth.

As I have walked this path of loss, I have noticed that some well-intentioned people have said things that shouldn't be said to a grieving person.  For example, someone said, “God needed another angel up there in Heaven.”  Please don’t ever say that to someone in mourning.  If God needed another angel, He would simply create more.  He doesn’t take someone to Heaven because He needs another angel.

Here’s another one: “Time heals all wounds.”  I’m processing living without my dad and you want to tell me that time is just going to heal my wound?  I’ve talked to enough people who have a lost a parent who would tell you that the wound from this kind of loss never really goes away.  Yes, in time it becomes more bearable, but it’s like a deep cut that can easily be re-opened.  For example, after hearing your loved one’s favorite song you are still going to cry.  Time doesn't heal all wounds.

Some will take on the role of Job’s friends and explain to the grieving person, in no uncertain terms, exactly why God did this.  Be very careful.  God’s ways and thoughts are not ours.  Sometimes there are no answers and that’s OK.  Furthermore, a grieving person doesn’t need an explanation; they need support.

By the way, I think it's important for me to state that when someone has said something inappropriate during this time of grieving and loss, I'm well aware that they were well-meaning.  They didn't intend to say something that they shouldn't have said.  Their heart was in the right place.  They wanted to speak words of comfort and healing.  So I'm not insinuating that I'm angry at the people who have said these odd phrases.  I'm writing this blog today because I'm walking a path of loss that you might not be walking, and thus I wanted to share my perspective with you.  

Furthermore, I’m not suggesting that you can’t say anything to a grieving person.  I’m simply proposing that it is best to use discernment, prudence, and common sense.  Put yourself in the grieving person’s shoes.  They have lost their loved one, so is it really wise to say, “God needed another angel in Heaven”?  It would be much better to just give the person a hug, and simply say, “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

Kevin

Three options

Earlier this week, I talked about how, in 2002, the Ferguson family was plunged into an unexpected ordeal when Rick’s Earthly life ended after a car accident.  This news rocked everyone because of the suddenness of it.  Rick was only 46 years old.  I’ve been thinking about this episode because of the similarities to the road the Bauer family is now walking.  To cite another example of this, both my dad and Rick Ferguson had their “homecoming” (as we like to call it) in July.

I have in my possession the CD of Rick Ferguson’s Memorial Service.  Listening to it again has helped me in my grieving process.  Brett Ferguson, Rick’s oldest son, delivered a message on that day that I’m certain helped many people.  He said many useful things, but I want to share one quote in particular.  Here’s what he said:

“[There are] three options.  There are three ways you can look at what happened Thursday [July 25th, 2002].  You can say it was an accident.  If there is a god, he’s not in control.  Tragic things happen in life.  Dad was here, he lived a great life, and now he’s gone.  It’s too bad.  It’s hard to make sense out of that [option].  You could say, “It wasn’t an accident, it was an attack from Satan.”  Dad was doing good things and Satan just took him.  Well, that leaves God pretty impotent, doesn’t it?

Or a third option: a beautiful [and] glorious appointment.  God is in Heaven.  He knows what is going on.  When [for example] Dad was hit by a car at age 13, God breathed life into him, because He knew that his appointment wasn’t until last Thursday [July 25, 2002].  So it’s up to you, you can look at this at any of those three ways.  I’m going to choose to look at this as an appointment.  Because I believe that God is sovereign [that is, that He is in complete control].”

I am with Brett.  Death is not a random, arbitrary event.  Nor is death a satanic attack.  Don’t forget that God is much more powerful than Satan.  For example, in the book of Job, God gives Satan the green light to afflict Job, but He tells the devil that he must spare Job’s life. Whether he liked it or not, Satan had to comply with God’s command.

Psalm 139:16 is a verse that is a tremendous comfort.  It reads, “Your eyes saw me when I was still an unformed child.  Every day of my life was recorded in your book before one of them had taken place” (GWT).  Even before my dad was born God knew when his “homecoming” was going to be.  We don’t live a day longer or a day shorter than what God ordained.

Kevin

The words I said at my father's service

I thought you would enjoy knowing what I said about my father at his funeral service.  So I transcribed it and will share them with you now.

“Hello everyone.  I’m the first-born son, Kevin.  I had the honor of calling Jerry my father.  You know, there’s only one Jerry Bauer.  There’s no way any of us could duplicate who he was.  Both my brother and I have a love for superheroes that he didn’t particularly share.  But that’s one of our quirks, we both love superheroes.

I’m a writer.  Not a professional writer, but I do love to write.  I found something that I wrote a couple years ago.  I said: ‘You don’t have to have superhuman speed or strength like Superman to be a superhero.  One can be a normal, everyday person, and be a superhero, if they live out their life in a self-sacrificial way.  If they live a life in humble service to others.’  I looked at that and I thought, “That’s my father.”  I’ll read it again.  ‘One can be a normal, everyday person, and be a superhero, if they live out their life in a self-sacrificial way.  If they live a life in humble service to others.’

My father was a superhero.  And coming from me, that is a very high compliment.  I want to be as selfless, altruistic, and unselfish as my father, Jerry, was.

God bless you all”

Kevin